Hi. It’s me. Lily.

Yesterday was a pretty normal day, except that evening we got a phone call from Crystal’s parents.  They found her in the bathroom, with pills around her, and.. not responsive.  She was breathing, but barely.  They called the EMT and got her to a hospital and, well, they managed to save her.   She’s alive.  But she’s in the hospital right now, and she’s in a coma.

They say she should be alright, but the next day or two are really critical.

Today we went to the hospital to see her.  She was lying in a bed, with all sorts of tubes and beeping monitors and… her parents were there.

I didn’t know what to say, or think, or do.  Her father hadn’t been sleeping.  He just sat there with a blank look on his face.  Her mother was asleep next to him in a chair, but you could see she’d been crying.

I’m…  numb, right now.  I don’t know what to say.  What can you say?  She’s been through so much, and we didn’t even know.  None of us knew.  If we’d known we would have tried to help.  She talks to a therapist too, Allison’s mother.  I guess she didn’t know either, because if she did, she’d have done something.  How did we not know?  How could we have known?  What could we have done differently?

It’s not fair, is it?  Life isn’t fair!  How bad does it have to get for a fourteen year old girl to… to do that???

I’m home now.  I’m waiting for news.  So is Beth.  Dave and Sabby managed to convince Beth’s parents to come to the house and get at least a little sleep.  They didn’t want to, but…  what were they going to do?  The hospital promised to give them a call with any news, and we’ll drive them over.

Will it ever be the same for any of us ever again?

I hear Beth sobbing.  I need to go.

I’m sorry, Crystal.  For not being a good big sister.