Category: Diary

Hi! It’s me! Lily!!!

Yeah, ummm… last night was really sad.  I don’t know what happened, but we all kind of piled together, you know, like we do… and then someone started sniffling, and then someone else started sniffling… and it didn’t take long before everyone was sobbing and head-petting and fetal-positioning and…. well… it got ugly for a while.  I don’t even know who started it, it could have been me, but…  I know how it ended.  About twenty minutes of wailing and then we all just passed out.  I’m pretty sure someone was even sobbing a little in their sleep.

Parting is difficult.  We’ve spent the last three years, give or take, together.  We lived through COVID, through Crystal trying (and thankfully failing) to kill herself, a couple of attempted assaults…  and everyone learning how to drive, and getting our first jobs, and going to Japan together, and…  all the stuff that makes us sisters.  I tried to tell everyone that we won’t stop being sisters… and we won’t… but it didn’t make it better.

We love each other.  I mean, we really, truly, love each other.  And no amount of distance will change that.

… is what I’d like to say, but can I say that for sure?  I mean, we’ll talk, and I’ll come visit, but can I say it for sure?

Emiko wants to come with me and Yuki to Japan.  How can we say no?  So she’s going to tag along.  She’ll just come and visit her relatives and go home, but I think she doesn’t want me to have no family when I leave.  Is she family?  Yes… I think she is.  I don’t know if I would have said that two years ago, but I do now.  We don’t see each other a lot, but she’s family.  Imperfect family, but family.  I forgave her a long time ago.

Am I sad?  Not as much as the others… not yet.  But I am.  I’m sad.  I’m very sad.  The life I knew is about to be over, replaced by a life I don’t know… mostly without my sisters.

Dangit… the tears are threatening again.

And it’s worse because it’s my decision that causes that.  I can always come back.  Travel around the world is instantaneous for me.  But I don’t think that’s healthy.  My sisters agree with me.  But… like Kanade said… “That and my frustration are two different things”.

But Crystal does seem to have found other friends with her band, and maybe they understand her a little more than I do.  Beth still has her vocal lessons and band stuff, and she’s kinda making more friends too.  And Diana, well, she’s never been a loner, she just likes hanging around us more than her other friends.  Everyone has friends…  but are they sisters?

I guess that’s why we all cry.

Love you all!!! ❤️

Hi! It’s me! Lily!!!

The girls are over tonight!!!  And… we’re actually a little sad..

Liz and I are leaving in a few weeks.

Liz got accepted to a college in California, and, well, that’s where she’s going now.  And, of course, I’m going to Japan.  And even though I can come back, well…  there’s the time difference and I’ll be busy and I don’t want to travel around the world too much, and… well…  it’s all changing.

It’s ending.  Just like this diary.

I’ve spent the last three years making friends and gaining sisters, and, well…  we’re all going our separate ways.  Well, Liz and I and Jack are, anyway.

I know it’s part of growing up… we all know it’s part of growing up, but…

There’s still this air of sadness permeating the room right now.  They’re trying to keep the mood up, but, well.. it’s kinda not working..

Oh well.  I guess we’ll go to bed.

Love you all!!! ❤️

Hi! It’s me! Lily!!!

Well, today was kind of boringly boring.  My revenge is sweet, though.  The girls are panicking a little.  Yuki and I told them everything will be fine, as long as they practice, they’re not being given really complicated stuff.  Basically just prancing or strutting around the stage and winking.

They wanted to make me a minor celebrity?  Well,  hah.  Now they get to share.

Well, to be fair, they didn’t want to, but they did anyway.

Otherwise… it’s hot.  As usual for summer in Texas.  I’ve never visited Tokyo in the winter, but I hear it snows sometimes.  That’ll be neat.  When it snows in Texas everyone starts crashing into each other and the power goes out.  Tokyo seems a little more sane about it.  Sometimes they seem a little more sane about everything, honestly.  But only sometimes.  Beth and I went out and washed the cars today.  And, well…  someone needed to tell Beth what happens when a t-shirt gets wet…. poor Beth.  But worse, poor neighborhood boys.  She ended up changing into a swimsuit tops.  Still poor boys, but at least she wasn’t embarrassed anymore.

I mean, heck, I lost my top once at the waterpark!  All she had was a translucent t-shirt!!!  Could be worse!!   It really is just a body, at the end of the day…                                  

I’ve been thinking.  I’ve been doing this diary for nearly three years now, and it’s coming time to end it.  I think I’m going to end it when I leave for Japan with Yuki at the end of August.

It’s been fun, it really has, and I like doing it and telling you about the antics of me and my friends and family, but all good things must come to an end, and…  maybe it’s time to start the next phase of my life.

So, that leaves about two months.  Maybe I’ll post some reminisces of posts and times I really like.  You know, like when I met Jack, and when I became sisters with all of my, well, sisters…  I’ll leave the diary up and maybe do some stuff to make it prettier and faster and everything… but I think I’m tired of it now.

But you still have about, what, six weeks with me or so?  Don’t worry!  I’ll still be around and Lilying!!!  Just… not here.

Love you all!!! ❤️

Hi! It’s me! Lily!!!

Well, the tropical storm was a whole lot of nothing.  Didn’t even see any walking trash cans.  But considering how it was in Houston, well, I think a whole lot of nothing is fine.

Emiko doesn’t have power, so I popped over with some food.  They were very appreciative.

See?  I don’t just use it to go to Japan…

But I do use it to go to Japan.  turns out I’m a little talented at dancing.  Or at least more than I thought I was.  I’ll never be a professional dancer, but I can do simple idol dances and I’m already pretty fit and flexible.  I can’t keep up with them right now, but I can hold my own, so that’s cool.  Japanese idol dancing is pretty much just coordinated arm movements anyway, so it all works out.

Dave says the only difference between epilepsy and dancing is the number of people doing it in sync.  That’s not very nice.  Funny…. but not very nice.,  haha!!!

Well, Japanese dancing isn’t like that.  Western pop music… I guess I see his point.

Anyway…  things are quiet today.  I popped over this morning to work with Miki and the choreographer.  It’s pretty good exercise at 4 AM… well, 4 AM my time anyway.

Okay, well…  I’m going to go to bed.  More dance lessons tomorrow.  I’m actually a kind of lucky girl, who else gets taught by professional choreographers at no cost???

When I come back, I show Yuki what I learned and she runs with that and teaches the other girls.  She’s nice like that.

Oh… speaking of Yuki… I’m going to fly with her to Japan.  No, I don’t have to.  But I’m going to anyway.  I want to keep her company.  When I told her that, tears sprung out of her eyes, and I’m not even really sure why.  Aww.

Love you all!!! ❤️

Hi! It’s me! Lily!!!

The set last night was amazing!!!  Crystal’s band wasn’t the only performers but they were one of three, and they were really good!!!  They even pulled a fast one on me and did a rendition of an anime ED I like!  “Happy Happy Friends!”  I didn’t even know they were practicing that one!!!

I clapped hard!!!  Hahaha!!!

Beth even sang it in Japanese!!!

Haha!!!

Beth can’t speak a lick of Japanese, but the diction classes took, and she can sing it phonetically.  And she has almost no accent when singing.  No idea how she pulled that off, but it’s amazing.

But they also did a few of Crystal’s unique songs, and girl’s been busy.  She wrote a song called “If I had a Time Machine”, and…  I gotta say, it’s sad.  I mean, really sad.  And when Beth sings it, you can hear the sorrow and rage and…  a little hope, too.  Beth’s had a privileged life, but she told me afterwards that she just thinks about Crystal’s life when she sings it, and it just kind of comes out.

But she wrote another song called “My sisters saved me”, and it’s kind of the opposite.  It’s a love song.  Whoever said love songs have to be romantic?  It’s a full fledged love song – but it’s to her sisters, like me.

Aww.

Beth is really good, too.  She’s got that clear, sultry voice that just runs over you like butter, and it’s even more jarring when she’s singing hard, angry metal.

There was an after party, and I asked the band members what they thought of Crystal’s music.  They said she’s amazing.  I think they’re right, she really is.  They’re happy playing their instruments and letting Crystal take the lead, because apparently, even though there’s been a few missteps and a little drama, she’s actually a decent leader.  She listens when they tell her she’s out of line, though, so it’s all good.

Maybe she found her calling.

I think I mentioned that Beth stayed in Crystal’s band?  I think I did.  Well, she did.  When we all left, she decided she wanted to keep singing, and it’s good experience for her.  She’s not sure she wants to do that after she starts college, but she’s not sure she doesn’t either.  I’m sure she’ll figure it out.

I hope someday she plays HEB Park or an even bigger place.  I’ll be there.

Anyway, otherwise, it’s been a pretty quiet weekend.  That tropical storm is supposed to track east but there might be a few walking trash bins tomorrow.   It’s supposed to move pretty quickly though so it’ll be out of here by tomorrow night.  the after party ran late so everyone slept in this morning.  We didn’t even go to church.  That’s fine, everyone needs a break sometimes.  I have it on good authority that the Boss doesn’t mind.

I think he’s far more concerned that we do his work than where we do it.

Speaking of which, for the after party last night, it was around midmorning in Japan, so the food stalls were open.  I got us a pile of Japanese food.  I didn’t mind, I’m not making a habit of that kind of thing but it was a special occasion.  I think the proprietor was confused when I kept coming back every ten or twenty minutes for another armload of food.  haha!!!

But as long as I handed over the yen, it was “irasshaimase!” and “arigatou gozaimasu!”  It’s rude to tip in Japan, but I was tempted, that was a lot of food.  It ended up being like one of those anime spreads with fish heads and everything.

Crystal’s bandmates were confused but she said “don’t ask questions, just enjoy the food.”

And, well, they did.

That’s two things I’ve noticed.  People won’t believe their eyes, and if you feed them, that covers a whole lot of questions.

Haha!!!

Anyway…. gotta go.  Got an early morning appointment with Miki and her choreographer again.  Her choreographer is a bit confused but apparently it’s a whole lot easier to get Japanese people to not ask questions.  Though you can tell she’s just burning with curiosity…

Okay!! Bye!!!

Love you all!!! ❤️

Hi! It’s me! Lily!!!

So today Miki had the day off, she she and I spent some time learning new dance steps, and she and I wandered around Tokyo for a bit, too.  I gotta say, this is really convenient.  But then I came back, crashed for a little bit, and then got all the girls together (that live here anyway, and we had the rest on a call) and I showed them how everything works.  They’re excited but a bit nervous.  Crystal even said that if I wanted to get them back, I did a pretty good job.

Hahaha!!!

But no one’s complaining too hard.  They’re actually practicing pretty diligently.  They’ll probably all come down a week early and we’ll practice some more before we go to Houston and spend some time with the choreographer.  I’ve got Miki on speed dial, too, and Yuki’s helping out, so it’s all good.

Usually my life’s weird, but this was my idea!  Haha!! Remember when I talked to the producer when I was in Japan?  I asked him if we could find a way to let all the girls actually perform a little.  He thought it was a good idea, and that it’ll help sell tickets to the matsuri.  More tickets means more eyes!!!  But it’s my job to make sure they’re as ready as they can be.

Tonight Crystal and her band have the grand opening at our new shop (which soft opened a couple of days ago), and they’re really looking forward to it.  I’m going to dress up a bit and go tonight as well.  I want to see how they sound.  It really looks nice!  Sabby kind of leaned into the “grungy live house” look, but also somehow made it look a little classy.  I don’t know how she does it, but I trust her a lot, and that’s why.  She’s not often wrong.  She is sometimes, but usually just about the small stuff.

We’ve got a tropical storm coming in a few days.  Dave says it shouldn’t be too bad, but we went to the store today anyway, just to be sure.  It looks like it’ll track just a bit east.

We sure do get the storms here.  We got a few boomies today, but nothing big.  Dave’s “Texan Tinkerer” friend was telling him how they still haven’t completely cleaned up from the tornado in Temple – his fences are still down and some roofs still are being worked on.  Aww.

Anyway…  guess I’m going to head down to the shop.  Crystal’s set is soon.

Love you all!!! ❤️

Hi! It’s me! Lily!!!

I didn’t post yesterday, so you get my post early today!  Lucky you!!!

Yesterday was fun.  Dave grilled, and we went to a park and played frisbee, at least until it got too hot.  The girls didn’t come over because they had their own family plans, so it was just me, Beth, and Yuki.  Still fun.  And we all still love Dave’s grilling.

We went to see a fireworks show later, and Jack came along.  It’s nice sitting there watching the fireworks and holding hands.  We didn’t snuggle much more because it was hot, but it was still nice.  I’d be lying if I said we didn’t steal a kiss or two, but we kept it discreet.

I need to decide my major.  I wonder what it will be.  It can’t really be music, so…  I dunno.  Maybe something involving foreign relations?  Seems like with  my skills I’d be pretty good at it.  Like how Mrs. X joined the military and became, well, whatever she is.

Maybe I’ll study Japanese more intensely and become a translator.  Maybe I can actually do good anime translations.

So many possibilities.. hard to choose just one.

Anyway…  I got some more dance moves to share with Yuki so we can teach everyone else.  Yuki’s here so I’m going to do that now.

Love you all!!! ❤️

Hi! It’s me1 Lily!!!

Okay, I failed.  I failed hard.  But in the end it doesn’t matter, I’m still gonna get my sisters back for what they did on that train in Japan.  So hah.

I failed because I can’t keep this a secret anymore.  There’s too many moving parts and I’m getting a lot of pushback.  So I set up a group call and told everyone what I’m planning.

And, well… actually, it’s turning out better this way.

So here’s the surprise.  Anime Matsuri is in Houston in August, and Miki’s idol group are the guests of honor.  And there’s going to be a performance of “Don’t embarrass your older sister on the train”.  And…  all of the girls who were in the original video (read:  all my sisters) are invited to come and dance in a performance.

It’s turning out better because now these girls are running around frantically and getting nervous and wondering how the heck they’re going to learn all these dance steps…  and they have to do it because their parents know and they’re not going to let them get away with not going.  Haha!!!  But as I said earlier – the point isn’t really to embarrass them.  I’m working with Miki to make sure they have a choreography they can do, and Miki’s group is coming over a couple of days earlier so we can all go to Houston and train with their choreographer so we won’t make a complete mess of it.  They’re being taken around Houston for a couple of days after the festival, but before, it’s all business.  And we’re a part of that business!  Haha!!!

And they get a little stipend too.  Nothing big, enough for a nice meal.  And some “After-school friends idol light music club” merch.

Basically, they need to put on their school uniforms (bet they regret getting those now, haha) and their multicolored wigs and do a few dance steps while the idol group sings and dances around them.  Nothing really fancy.  I mean, they’re not pros and we all know it.  But Yuki’s in on it too and she’ll help teach them.

Nothing like dancing around on stage in front of a few thousand otaku.  But it’s alright.  I bet they get a great reception.  The video is popular.

Anyway…

Some of the neighbors are out popping fireworks.  I want to go look.

Love you all!!! ❤️

Hi! It’s me! Lily!!!

I’m tired.  They’re having me do lots of dancy stuff, and I’m stretching muscles I didn’t know I had.  Aww.  I don’t know how I’m going to teach the girls, maybe I should just hire a dance tutor or something.  At this rate I’m going to have to tell them about the surprise because otherwise I don’t think I can convince them to do this.

Aww.  I didn’t think about how difficult this would be to put together.  Well, even if not all can dance, there’s still something they can do!!!

They’re not getting off that easily!!! Hahaha!!!!

Either way, we’ll figure something out.

Yuki’s actually kind of looking forward to going back to Japan.  I think she’s come to terms with her time as an idol now.  It seems like it was a little traumatic in some ways, but she says she has some good memories too, it’s just…  she wants something genuine, and being an idol was pretty much the exact opposite of genuine.  I told her I can pop over some of her stuff when we’ve got the apartment but she’ll have to ship some over too.  Once we get there I’m going to make sure the Aidols and the idol group and Haruka and Suzuka and everyone I know there gets together and goes to an amusement park or something.  Yuki needs lots of friends and I think that’s something that was missing last time, and, well, I’m not letting that happen again.  I won’t try to run her life or anything, but I’m not letting her go friendless.

If I did, I’d be a rotten sister…

Dave bought all the stuff for grilling on the fourth.  We’re gonna have a feast!  And everyone’s invited.  I wish I could invite the aidols and Miki’s group…  but they’re not gonna hop a ten hour flight just to grill with us.  Even though I think Suzuka might actually think the BBQ is worth it.  haha!!!

I’ve noticed that these days I talk a lot more about my Japanese friends than I do my American friends… but I think that’s normal.  I’m about to move there, for a while, anyway.  My life is about to change, and my friends, well, they’re not changing but they’re refocusing a little, I guess.  I’m going to make lots and lots and lots of Japanese friends, and my American friends will be, well, in America.  It’s just how things go.  But Beth already told me I have no excuse for not coming by sometimes and having a girl pile and eating lots of chocolate with everyone.

And, you know, she’s right.  I can’t make a habit of it because it’ll wreak havoc on my sleep, but…  I can’t completely stay away.  It wouldn’t be right.

I just can’t.

I’m a little sad.  Well, I’m a lot sad.  But I’m also looking forward to my new, if temporary life.

I still haven’t chosen my major in college yet.  And I really should.  I have to register anyway.

Love you all!!! ❤️

Hi! It’s me! Lily!!!

I’m an idiot.  I mean, I’m really an idiot.  Sabby asked me if I’d talked to any of the parents of the girls I want to teach the dance to.

I hadn’t.

I can let them in on the surprise even if I don’t tell the girls so they can help out.

So I talked to some of the parents today and they’re all for it, they thing it’s pretty funny.  They even had some ideas.  …  which I’ll keep to myself right now.  But they’re willing to help with airfare, so…  that works out.  They just said to tell me when and where to send their daughters.

Hahaha!!!

Funny thing is, none of them said no.  They thought it was hilarious.

I have a feeling they’re going now even if they figure out what the surprise is and want to back out!!!  Some of the parents said they deserve a little something something for embarrassing me like that.  It’s not an embarrassing surprise, but.. well…  it could be.  A little bit.

I won’t deliberately make it one, just by its nature…

Anyway.

Independence day is this Thursday.  Jack and I are going to a fireworks show.  I wish I could take him to a fireworks festival in Japan, but this will have to do.  I need to spend more time with him anyway.  He’s not upset or anything, but I’ve been so busy having a weird life… but I do need to spend more time with him, especially with college coming up.

He means a lot to me.  I haven’t been very good at showing it.

Yuki and I are making plans to live together.  I already have an apartment lined up, but I asked the leasing people if they can change it to one for two people, and she said she’d see what she could do.  I told Yuki I don’t mind paying the bills for a little while., but she can’t become a NEET.  She has to do something.  Go to school, get a job, take some training…  something.  She agreed.  She said she doesn’t want to live a dependent life anyway.

I asked her what she wants to do.

She said she might want to take actual voice lessons and leverage her former idol status to become a pop or anisong singer, or maybe learn to be an anime voice actor.

I’ve heard her sing.  She’s not bad.  Could use some training, but she definitely does have the stage presence.  I’ll root for her.

Crystal’s band is really rocking.  They practiced yesterday.  Crystal’s been taking guitar lessons on one of those online sites, and somehow got even better.  She’s not quite to the point of shredding yet, but she’s very competent and is holding her own in her band.  They’ve got a few gigs lined up, one at our new place – the grand opening is very soon.  People here in Round Rock are starting to at least know who they are.

And Beth is getting pretty good at singing too.  She’s not quite to the point where she could teach Yuki things, but they’re pretty much on par.  And considering Yuki is a former idol.. that’s saying something.  I think she still wants to go to college for science, but she likes it a lot as a hobby.

Anyway…  gotta go.  I need to get up early to pop over to Tokyo to take some more dance lessons from Yuki and the others.  When the others ask, I just say I’m going to college in Japan.  They don’t have to know I don’t live there yet.  They have me stretching and doing exercises and stuff.  Oww.  Especially at 4 AM my time…  but then I get to pass that on to the girls, so it all balances out.

Love you all!!! ❤️