This diary entry is part 24 of 31 in Lily's diary dated 14 - August 2022

I’m going to skip the hi and love you all today, because I am mad.  I mean, mad.  Mad like I’ve never been mad before.  It was hard to keep it together today, and it might be hard to keep it together now, but I’ll try.

Did you see the little thing someone put on the end of yesterday’s diary?  I don’t know how he or she did it, and I don’t care – though I did change my password, fat lot of good that would do me.  But he or she basically told me that I was coming close to learning things I shouldn’t be learning.

As Sabby would say, oh no you didn’t.

This is MY LIFE.  I’m the one with no memories!  I’m the one who is trying to piece together who I am, with absolutely no help from anyone who knows anything, and I’m the one who has to deal with what is starting to look like someone’s deliberate choices.  My history, my memories, are not things I shouldn’t be learning, and I don’t care what they are.  You have no right, and neither did anyone else involved.  Who do you think you are, anyway?  Some person over in Washington who doesn’t know me and who I don’t know, playing with my life like I’m your toy, telling me not to find out who I am?  You’re not the one who spent a week straight crying because I didn’t even know my name!

In Japanese there is a word, and I’m going to use it now.  You can look it up or not, I’m sure its meaning will be clear from context.

ざけんなよ

If you don’t have anything valuable to contribute, just butt the hell out!  I don’t know who you are, all I know is that every time you’ve ever gotten involved with my life you screw it up!  Just stop it!  Go away!  I hate you!

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