Hi! It’s me! Lily!!!
I… had a dream.
It was so real.
Remember that dream I told you about a long time ago? I can’t remember exactly when, let me look it up. Oh. Here it is. It was very much like that dream, I was in the field again, and I was a little girl. The sky was perfect blue, the clouds puffy, the temperature was perfect. There were fruits and breads on the blanket, and some juices too. And the woman who was there in my last dream, was there, with me.
‘Yuriko”, she said, her voice melodious. “Or, Lily, now.”
“Vanessa Rittenhouse?”, I asked, my voice a little higher than I’m used to.
“I was once known as that, yes,” she said. “I’ve been given permission to visit you one final time. Ask me any question. I will answer if I can.”
“What can’t you answer?,” I asked.
“Ask me and find out,” she said softly.
“What happened to my memories?”, I asked.
She chuckled softly. “You went right for it, I see. That’s my Yuriko. Well, the answer is, we don’t know. We had taken you to work with us to see the experiment we were doing. The experiment failed. We don’t know how. No one where I am will tell me, except to say that we shouldn’t have done it. You were far enough away from the experiment that it didn’t hurt you. Well… much. We… were not so lucky.”
“What was the experiment?”, I asked, my mind reeling.
“I can’t tell you, not exactly,” she said. “We were playing with energies, with realms, that are not toys and should not be played with. Some things… some things are better left alone.” She sniffled. “I wish we’d realized that then.”
“Will I ever get my memories back?”
Her gaze went unfocused for a short time. “Very unlikely,” she said. “Not impossible, but no one in my realm has figured out how to do it, either. And we have vastly more resources available to us.”
I frowned. This wasn’t good news.
“How did I end up on the side of the road?”, I asked.
“We don’t know,” she said softly. “At that time, we were in a time of, shall we say, transition. We were preoccupied. We didn’t see what happened.”
I sat quietly. A bird was chirping in the distance. It was a high, clear call, oddly beautiful.
“Why is my dog named Marie?”, I asked.
“Well, that should be obvious,” she chuckled. “Marie Curie”.
The bird call was getting a little louder.
“What does ‘lycoris radiata’ mean?”, I asked.
“It is your flower,” she said. “A symbol of death, but beautiful all on its own. They are the flowers of the heavens. The accident opened heaven, Lily. It opened heaven, and it opened hell, and you were touched by heaven in a way few humans ever are. Lily, many beings are watching over you. You are loved, both on earth and in heaven. Always remember that, Lily. You are loved.”
The bird call was almost deafening now, and I woke up. It was my alarm clock, beeping incessantly.
There was something on my chest.
It was iridescent, impossibly light but every petal seemingly immovable, shining with a light from within.
“You are loved,” it whispered into my heart.”
I just laid there, looking at it. How did it get into my room?
Then I screamed.
Dave and Sabby came running in, and I just started blubbering. They looked at me, and the glass-like flower, with confusion, and finally Sabby just took me in her arms and I started wailing, in a combination of terror, confusion, and… sadness. I told them about my dream, and they looked at the flower, and then me. And they told me to get showered and dressed, we were going to see the pastor.
I guessed that was as good a plan as any, and I complied.
An hour later, we were at the pastor’s house, and he looked like he had just woken up. We sat down on his sofa.
“What happened that was so urgent that you had to wake me up at this hour of day?”, he asked, chuckling but also making clear he was dead serious.
So I told him. Everything. I told him about my dream, and then showed him the flower.
He took the flower, and spun it around a little to see it from all angles. He sighed. “All I can think of to do is pray over it,” he said.
And so he did.
As we were praying, we all heard a soft, disembodied voice. It was gentle, and it said this: “Lily has been given a gift. It comes from great sadness and suffering, as do the most precious gifts. Do not fear, but rejoice. Look on the flower, and remember.”
And then it was silent.
The pastor was quiet. “Lily… I have never had that happen before.”
“Is… is it okay?”
He was quiet for a bit longer. “I think it is. Lily, what did the woman say again about the reason you lost your memories?”
I thought for a bit. “She said that I had been touched by heaven.”
“Who else among us can claim that as directly as you?, he asked, shaking his head. “Tell me if anything else happens, but what else can I say? I heard the same message you did. I’m just a pastor,” he said wistfully. “I help people find God, as best I know how. It.. seems he has found you.”
Lycoris Radiata. Red Spider Lily. My flower. Touched by heaven…
I have much to think about. But, if I’m being honest, I’m a little afraid to sleep tonight.