Category: Diary

Hi!  It’s me!  Lily!

You’d think after the great events of Thursday that I would be happy, but I’m not, not really.  I mean, I am so happy that I was officially adopted and everything, but…  yesterday was hard.

I went over to Liz’s house, and it was awkward.  We just talked.  We talked a lot.  She told me she has no siblings and started to think of me as her sister too, like Beth does.  When Beth came along, she felt pushed to the side.

And I had no defense for that, because it was true.

But Beth is my sister now, in every sense of the word, and I told Liz that I love her just as much as Beth, but if she wants to be my best friend, we have to make room for Beth.  Liz wasn’t too happy with this, but she understood.  She thought she had one sister, but she has to deal with two now.  We’re still friends, best friends even, but I think she’s going to have to take a little time to get used to the situation now.  It makes me sad, though.  I love Liz.

I think we’ll pull through, though.  I pointed out to Liz that I think Beth is smarter than I am, and Liz looked thoughtful.  Liz is a wonderful person and I love her, but she is wicked smart – her parents are always making her go to classes to learn how to do this or that, or get extra tutoring in this or that, and she’s way more brilliant than I could ever be.  Beth might give her a run for her money, so I pointed out that they would probably get along, and Beth needs people who are more her type intellectually.  Liz didn’t seem too enthusiastic, but she accepted that it may be true, and she’s going to give Beth a chance.

And I promised her that I would never push her aside.  She seemed unsure, but she took my word for it.

I guess that’s all we can hope for.

I invited Liz back to our house for dinner, and she accepted.  Sabby was nice and made one of her favorite (non-Chinese) dishes – Beef Stroganoff.  It was a little awkward, but eventually Beth started chattering about some science experiment she’d read about, and Liz just… took off.  It was a sight to behold!  Words I’d never heard before and probably couldn’t repeat, and Beth was keeping right up!

I think it’ll be okay.

Afterwards we all watched a movie for our movie night.  Beth wanted to see “Contact”, and Liz said it was one of her favorite movies.  I loved it!  It was so…  so…  hopeful.  Baby steps, Ellie.  Baby steps.  Afterwards, Beth and I invited Liz up for our hairbrushing ritual and Liz seemed to enjoy herself.  She has no siblings and her parents aren’t very demonstrative, so I think she enjoys a little physical contact, and her hair is so thick and beautiful.  Liz went home, but not before telling Beth that she forgives her.  They hugged and I wiped tears away.  Dang onions!

It’s still a bit awkward but I think we’ll get through it.

People are hard sometimes.

Love you all!!! ❤️

Hi!  It’s me!  Lily!

I’m sorry Liz!!!  I’m so sorry!!!

I remember when I first met Liz.  We were in an online school, and I can’t remember why, but we started to chat over DM.  I think she had a question.  But we started talking, and found out we lived just a few doors from each other, and I went to visit.  Her parents, were nice, but strict.  When the lockdowns were lifted, we started going places together, and I found out I really liked her!  You see, I didn’t have any family!  I mean, I had Sabby and Dave, but I didn’t trust them yet, and Beth and David hated me!  She was always there for me!

But lately, as my relationship with my family improved, I didn’t spend as much time with Liz, and now I think she feels left out.  OMG, I’m sooooo sorry!  I really didn’t mean it, Liz!  I really didn’t!  I love you, you know that!!!!!  You’re my family too!  You’ll always be my family!!!

I remember all the fun stuff we’ve done together, and…  this hurts.  This really hurts.  I’m sorry!!!  We’re going to spend some time together today before school starts, just me and her, and…  and I’m sooo sorry.  I really am.

I need to take a shower go I can go over to Liz’s and apologize in person.  Over and over again.

Hi!  It’s me!  Lily Smith!!!

OMG THIS IS THE HAPPIEST DAY OF MY LIFE!!!!!

So yesterday i was just having an ordinary boringly boring day, when we had some visitors to the house.  It was our lawyer, and he had someone else with him!  It was a judge!

They sat us all down in the living room and told me that she would sign the adoption papers today, like RIGHT NOW, but she had a few questions to ask first.

She asked Sabby if she was willing to be my adopted mother.  She couldn’t answer through the tears but choked out a “yes”.

She asked Dave, and he just softly said, “She’s already like our second daughter.  Of course.”

Beth simply said “She’s already my sister.”

David, of course, shrugged.  That was good enough.  He’s nine anyway.

Then the judge, finally, asked me what I wanted.

The tears were rolling down my face, and all I said was “If I ever get my memories back, I’d want Dave and Sabby to be my real parents too.”  At that point Sabby just lost it and glomped me.  The judge looked a bit amused, but her eyes were wet as well.  Even our lawyer seemed misty-eyed.

And then the judge signed the papers, and it was done.  She explained that for people like me that don’t have a recorded birthday (usually those are third world people but I guess I’m an exception) my birthday will be Jan. 1.  I asked her if it could be July 25, but she said that her powers were limited and that’s all she could do.  But that makes me sixteen!  I can get a job and learn to drive and all those things sixteen year olds can do!!!  I’m so happy!!!!!!

After all was concluded, the judged asked if she could give me a hug, and I happily agreed.  She told me I could go to the courthouse and get all the documents by the end of the week.  She wished me a good life and left.

I glomped Sabby.  I was crying.  “What – how -“, I asked through the tears.

She hugged me back.  “I have no idea.  I think they wanted to get it out of the way before the school year started.  You’re not going back there, and neither are Beth or David.”

David cheered.  “No school!!!”

Sabby looked at him reprovingly.  “Not so fast.  I hired a teacher for you three.  She teaches a few other students as well.  You’re getting an education, and you won’t be able to get away with stuff like you would at your regular school.”

“Aw man,” he said, dejectedly, and sulked back up to his room.  Sabby chuckled.

Beth looked pensive.  “What about my friends?”

“What about them?  If they’re your friends, you’ll figure it out.  If they’re not, we’ll find you new ones.”

I piped up, “You said your friends were doing things you didn’t want to do anyway!”

Sabby’s face turned thunderous.  “Explain.  Now,” she said to Beth.  Beth gave me the evil eye, but did as she was told.  She told Sabby about how her friends would just sit at the convenience store and talk about boys, and how she wanted to talk about more interesting stuff, and her friends didn’t care.

Sabby’s expression became more neutral as she realized it wasn’t as bad as she thought.  “I see.  We’ll talk about this later.  I really do wish you would have told me this earlier.”

Beth side-glanced at me.  I think I messed up.

“But today we’re going to celebrate Lily’s official adoption.  Clean up.  We’re going to lunch.”

Beth still didn’t look happy, but she did like to eat.  We went to a steakhouse.  It was delicious.  Everyone was happy, but Beth was a little cold.  I don’t think I blamed her.

Later that evening, I knocked on Beth’s door.  She was quiet but said “come in” anyway.  I opened it hesitantly.

“I’m sorry -” I said.

She sighed.  “Don’t be.  I wish you hadn’t told my secret.  I’m still just a bit mad about that.  But you were right.  I always feel like I’m wasting my time when I’m with them.”

“Maybe you need new friends.”

“Maybe I do,” she said.  “Or maybe I need to talk to them first and tell them I want to do more interesting things sometimes.  Mom talked to me privately about peer pressure.  She’s right.  It’s not good for me.”

I sat on the bed next to her and reached for the hairbrush.  She automatically turned her back to me and removed her hairpins.  I started brushing her hair.

“I’m still sorry,” I said.  “I shouldn’t have blurted that out.”

Her eyes were already closed.  “It’s alright,” she mumbled, her eyes already starting to droop.  “I forgive.. you…” she was already starting to zone out.  I made it an extra good brushing, and even added in a bit of a scalp massage.  I really didn’t mean it.

So I’m officially officially a Smith now!  And Beth is my sister!  And even when we’re mad at each other we’ll still be sisters!  I love Beth!!!  I love Sabby!!! I love everyone!!!!!!

And I love you all!!!! ❤️

Hi!  It’s me!  Lily!

We went to the grocery store again today!  No Karens this time!  We saw the manager and he told us that Karen was officially banned from every one of their stores in the area!  She really got herself into trouble!

And after Dave had a big surprise for me!  He took me out to a deserted parking lot and let me drive!  I’ve never driven before!  It was scary and fun all at the same time!  He was very patient with me, even when I went a little too fast.

You know, I’ve never ridden a bicycle before!  I just realized that today!  I asked Dave if I can learn to ride one!  He said yes!  They have an old one in the garage that Sabby never rides, so they’re going to let me use it.  I can’t wait!  Even though I’m scared of falling off.  I guess my first lesson will be in the grass!  With long clothing!  And kneepads!

So anyway Dave let me drive, and it was really scary, but I think it was more scary for him.  He tells me I’m a responsible girl, and he was still clutching the seat like he was going to die at any minute!  He tells me there are some cars with three pedals!  Three!  How do you drive one of those?  He said if he can find one, he’ll teach me.  His voice was shaking a bit when he said that.  Haha!  Dave’s a silly billy!  Well… maybe not.  I guess me behind the wheel of a two ton hunk of steel deserves a little fear.  But he’s still a silly billy!!!

When we got home, Dave got a beer.  He never drinks.  Poor Dave.  But he did offer.  And I did alright.  No damage to us or the car, I didn’t hit anything or anyone, and it could have been much worse, especially for my first time.

Well, not much to say today.  The cat’s washing its butt again!  ewww!

Love you all!!!  ❤️

Hi!  It’s me! Lilly!

Well, I’m not as embarrassed anymore, I guess.  Yeah, some boys saw my floppy bits.  Oh well.  Nothing to be done about it now.  I guess these things just happen.  I’m more upset about the bird dying, but nothing to be done about that either.

Yes, I know the real names!  But this is a family friendly blog!  So I’m not going to call them what they’re supposed to be called, they’re floppy bits and girly bits, so there!  I promised Sabby!  But some things aren’t easy to talk about without using some kind of name, I guess!!

I was wrong!  School starts next week!!!  Oh no!!!  Sabby still hasn’t decided what to do, and she tells me the social workers are being a little stubborn about my going to school.  Sabby may have to let me go, at least until she can officially adopt me.  The interference seems to be happening again – I don’t understand it.  Sabby told me that the social workers were telling her that we’d have to do all sorts of stuff to adopt me – petition the court, file all sorts of papers, give Beth up as a sacrifice – kidding! But it looked so insurmountable, and then something happened again and they said someone really high up intervened.  So we’ll still have to see a judge, but I just have to agree to it, and all of the social workers, etc., have been ordered to not fight it.  Who ordered them?  They won’t tell us.  We don’t know.  But someone is really looking out for me.

At least I hope they’re looking out for me.

But I can’t wait to be an officially official Smith!!!  A real Smith!!!  Dave and Sabby’s daughter!!!  Oh, I love the sound of that!  I love Dave, that big ol’ balding silly billy, and Sabby, that not so big ol’ motherly silly billy, and Beth, my new silly billy sister, and even David!  And the cat!  I love the cat too!  Even though it always washes its butt!  Ewwww!  It’s a silly billy too!  But a cuddly one.

They say it could only be a month or so.  We just have to get on the docket.  It’s amazing how helpful social workers can be when they’re ordered to.

Oh, don’t get me wrong.  Mine have been awesome!  Or at least as awesome as government workers in a government bereaucracy can be.  But apparently someone greasing the wheels a bit makes them even more awesome!

Our lawyer is also trying to figure out what to do about my lack of birthday.  He’s going to petition the court to assign me one when the adoption goes through.  I’m going to ask for Lily Day.  Would that make me sixteen?  Or seventeen?  I guess we’ll decide then.  Maybe we’ll ask my doctor what he thinks.  As they keep telling me, this is truly unprecedented.  They can’t think of anyone else in the first world who doesn’t know when they were born, and neither does anyone else.

Well, nothing interesting going on, I just got back from a run and didn’t find a dying bird so yay?  I did see a jackrabbit, though.  They’re cute.  Furry little silly billy rabbits, hopping around doing rabbit things.  And squirrels!  I see lots of squirrels!  They’re cute little silly billy nut hoarders.  I saw little animals, I kept my top on, I had a run, and now I’m going to shower!  It’s a good day!

Love you all!!!  ❤️

Hi!  It’s me!  Lily!

OMG I AM SO EMBARRASSED!!!

So yesterday we went to the waterpark.  We got to the waterpark and we were all having a good time.  I went down the waterslide and LOST MY TOP!!!!!

OMG!!!

So I didn’t know it happened and I was just sitting there in the water, still coming off the adrenaline of sliding down the slide, and Beth was frantically waving her arms at me.  I waved back, and she screamed “no!  look down!”.  So I did.

OMG THEY WERE FLOATING IN THE WATER…. AND I WAS COLD!!!!

So I immediately covered the girls with my hands and yelled at Beth to find my top.  She was giggling like a schoolgirl, well, because she is a schoolgirl, but she looked for it, and NO ONE KNEW WHERE IT HAD GONE!!!!!

So I went to get out of the pool, still covering them with my hands, and several boys were staring!  I gave them the stink eye!  Sabby ran up to me with a towel and covered me up, and gave the boys the stink eye too.

“See something interesting?”, she said, with just a hint of threat in her voice.

They looked away, but I caught them giving me quick glances.

I know I know I said in another post “what’s the big deal, it’s just a body”, but people were staring.  AAAAAGGGGGHHHHH.

So finally they found my top and Sabby held up the towel while I put it back on, and my entire body was beet red, I was blushing so hard.  Sabby was smirking.

“What’s so funny?,” I growled sulkily.

“Really, Lily.  Would you have found it funny if it were anyone else?”

I lowered my head and murmured quietly, “prolly.”

She patted my shoulder.  “It’s just a body,” she said quietly.

I sighed.  She had mirrored my exact words.  I had covered up, so I gave the towel back to Sabby and walked proudly back to the stairs of the slide.  A bit too proudly, because I caught the boys staring again. I glared at them.  They had the decency to look away.

I climbed the stairs and went down again.  I kept my top that time.

You know, looking back on it, it’s really not a big deal.  So some people saw my floppy bits.  Oh well.  It could have been a lot worse.  My girly bits were never in danger.  And even if they were, oh well.  Half of us got ’em anyway.

After we got home, I told Liz what happened, and I thought she was going to fall over laughing.  She was clutching her sides and everything.  I didn’t think it was that funny, but I guess it was a little funny.  When I said I wanted to make new memories, I didn’t mean that!

Well, then what did I mean, after all?

I guess…  I guess I kinda meant that after all.  Good memories, bad memories, this was just an embarrassing but funny memory.  The kind you tell your kids about.

Beth told me she hopes she looks like me when she’s my age.  So at least there’s that.

I called the shelter about the bird.  It didn’t make it.   But everyone did everything they could for it, and I guess that’ll have to be enough.  I hope it died somewhat comfortably.  Better than expiring on the side of the road, don’t you think?

Only a little better, but in this life, we take what we can.

Other than the most embarrassing moment of my life (that I can remember), and the little bird, nothing interesting happened.  It’s the start of another week.  School’s starting in just a few weeks, and I have no idea if we’ll actually be going or not.  Sabby is actually starting to talk seriously about home schooling us.  Truthfully, I kinda hope she does, though I was looking forward to doing sports.  But who knows if we’d do sports this year anyway.  I think she’ll be a great teacher.  She’s really smart.  And Beth can probably teach me some stuff too.

Love you all!!! ❤️

Hi!  It’s me!  Lily!

Lily is a sad Lily today.  Not a silly billy Lily like some days.  I was out on a run this morning and found an injured bird.  It had a broken wing.  It was sitting there, all huddled on the ground, and obviously in a lot of pain.

What could I do, though?  I ran home and got a kennel, and got Dave to drive me out to where the bird was.  We gently put the bird in the kennel and brought it home.  Poor thing was scared and in a lot of pain.  We looked up a wildlife rehabilitator (thankfully in this area there are quite a few) and one was open at 8.  So we drive a few miles up and dropped the poor thing off.  They told us it was probably not going to survive, but they’d give it the best chance they could.

Sometimes life is good, and sometimes life sucks.  I think I see what Sabby means now about life being not fair.  That bird didn’t ask to have a broken wing!  It was just going along and doing bird things, and it broke its wing!  How?  It got hit by a car?  It ran into a window?  I don’t know.  But, Lily, there are plenty of birds out there!  Yes, but that one was hurt!  I found that one!!!

Sabby said it wasn’t fair that I lost my memory, too.  Out of all the people on this planet, I was the one to be found on the side of the road with no memory, just like that little bird was found on the side of the road with a broken wing.  It’s just how life works.  Sometimes you’re just humming along, having a good time, and bam.  Life hits.  And something gets destroyed.  A wing.  Or memories.

And Sabby took me in, just like the rehabilitator took that little bird in.  I’m sure they’ll give it food and water and safety, but maybe that won’t be enough.  Maybe Dave and Sabby won’t be enough for me.  Sometimes life just hits too hard, and things die.

Normally we’d go to church, but I didn’t want to.  Besides, church was already started by the time we got home from the rehabilitator.  So I just went up to my room and curled up in bed.  No silly billy Lily, just sadness.

Sabby came up, though.  She knew it affected me, but she didn’t know why.  She sad down on the side of my bed.

“It hurts, doesn’t it?,” she said.

I nodded.  I didn’t really want to speak.

“Do you remember what I said about maybe you’d understand someday?  About how life isn’t fair?  About why we ask you to go to church?”

I just laid there.  I didn’t have anything to say.  She reached out and brushed my hair off my forehead.  I closed my eyes.

“You couldn’t let that bird lay there dying, could you?”

I shook my head.  Tears were threatening.

“That’s why I took you in, Lily.”  She cupped my face and wiped a tear from my eye with her thumb.  I leaned into her touch, and the tears started flowing for real.  I threw off the blankets and clung to her for dear life, sobbing it out.  She rubbed my back.

“It’s not fair, Lily.  But you were there for that little bird.  I was there for you.  Do you understand now?”

I nodded, and rested my head on her shoulder.

“Life’s not fair, but that doesn’t mean we can’t try to make it better.”

I wiped the tears from my eyes.

“I understand now,” I said quietly.  “I wish I didn’t.”

She chuckled.  ‘No one wants to understand, Lily.  But everyone finds their own bird on the side of the road.  It’s what we do when we find it, that matters.  You couldn’t leave it there.”  She gently pushed my back, and raised my chin with her fingertip.  “You’re a good girl, Lily.  I wish I could say I raised you that way.  But I’m glad I found you.”

She kissed my forehead.  I lowered my forehead in that now familiar way, and accepted the kiss.  She rubbed the top of my head and stood up.

“Now take a shower,” she said.  “You don’t want to be all smelly when we go to the waterpark.”

I suddenly felt a bit happier.  “We’re going to the waterpark?”

“How could we not?  After all those hints…”

“I wasn’t…”

“No matter.  We’re going.  It’s decided.  Beth and David want to go too.  So go take a shower so we can go.”

It was a sad morning.  I’m still a little sad.  But the bird is in good hands.  I’m in good hands.  We’re going to the waterpark.  I don’t think Liz can go, but that’s okay.  Beth and I are getting along now, we’ll make do.  (I love you, Liz, but you have your classes!  I’m sorry!)

So I’m wearing my swimsuit under my clothes now and we’re going to the waterpark!  It started out a bad day.  But maybe it will end a better day.  I love you, Sabby.  With all my heart.

Love you all!!!!  ❤️

Hi!  It’s me!  Beth!

You thought it was going to be Lily, didn’t you?  Well, it usually is, obviously, but Lily agreed to let me guest post.  She gets to look at it before I hit the button though!

I didn’t actually know Lily posted on a blog like this until a couple of days ago.  It’s not the coolest thing ever, I mean, who blogs anymore?  It’s all TikTok or Twitch or whatever, but she seems happy with it, and she’s a silly girl.  So I guess whatever works for her, right?

I remember when I first met Lily.  My parents brought her home, and she looked so scared and alone.  I hated her.  My life was perfect and she just came in and ruined it all!  At least that’s what I thought.  My mom was always spending time with her, and I hated that!  My mom belonged to me!  Not her!

I called her so many names, names I can’t repeat here.  All she ever did was cry, especially in that first week.  After a while, when I would tease her or call her names or tell her I hated her, all she did was just look at me with those big, sad eyes of hers.  Her eyes are so expressive, it’s like you can look at them and know just what she’s thinking or feeling without saying a word!  Eventually I started to feel bad.  She didn’t do anything to me, not really, and she’s just a sad, lonely, and confused girl.

But I didn’t really say anything to her until Lily day, when we went to the waterpark.  I was a little cheesed that she got a day of her own, but my mom told me to suck it up, I get a birthday, and who knows when her birthday is?  That’s when I really started to feel horrible about how I’d treated her.  She doesn’t know what her name is.  She doesn’t even know what her birthday is.  And I’m jealous because my mom gives her a little extra attention?  I’m such a selfish girl!

And we went to the waterpark.  She was having so much fun with Liz, like when Liz fell in and then pulled her in, and I just kind of sat there in my bikini on the edge of the pool and wiggled my toes in the water.  She’s gone through so much and yet she’s so happy and cheerful!  A boy sat next to me and we talked for a bit.  He was cute, but…  my mind was elsewhere.  Eventually he got up and left.  I mean, really. I’m only fourteen anyway!

So finally, we were watching a movie, and I just decided I’d had enough of being angry and jealous and mean.  So I did what any self respecting girl would do, and cuddled up to her and fell asleep.  You should have seen the look on her face!  But then she started stroking my hair, and it was so nice, just like I imagined having a sister would be like.  But she didn’t say anything.  I was so worried that she wouldn’t forgive me.

But she did!  She did forgive me!  I was so relieved, I started crying!  And she’s so nice!  Even though I hurt her she wants to be my sister!  But now we do so much together, and every night we brush each others’ hair, and we cuddle together on movie nights, and, and….  it’s amazing!  I love having a sister!  Especially one like Lily!

Oh, Lily, don’t cry!!!

I know I hurt her, and I’m so sorry for that.  Liz hasn’t forgiven me yet, and I don’t blame her.  But… but maybe we can move on and be a family together.

Last night we watched a movie together, and like Lily says, she’s a big warm teddy bear that I just love cuddling with.  I didn’t see the whole movie because I fell asleep.  She kept stroking my hair and, well, I can’t stay awake when someone’s stroking my hair!  It’s so nice!  She’s so nice!

Maybe Lily will let me guest post sometimes.  I’m glad she let me this time.  I’m sorry, Lilly!  I’m sorry, Liz!  I really am!  I wish I could take it all back, but I’m glad I’m your sister now!  Liz, please forgive me!  Please!  I’ll be nice!  I promise!!!

Lily loves you all!!!  And so do I!  ❤️

Hi!  It’s me!  Lily!

It’s Friday!  Yaaaay!  Oh, wait.  I don’t work and school’s out.  Well, I’m sure some of y’all are happy it’s Friday.  So yaaaay for you!  Yaaaaay!  We’ll do the Friday dance!

I don’t know what the Friday dance is, but I did it.  I just kinda wiggled in my chair a bit.  Yaaaay Friday!!!

I haven’t told you where I live, but I’ve been dropping hints.  Have you picked up on them yet?

So nothing interesting’s happened.  It’s another boringburger, boringly boring day.   I wonder if they’re going to make us go back to school or if we’re going to do remote learning again.  I don’t really mind remote learning, frankly, I haven’t ever gone to school.  Sabby likes remote learning because she can hear what the teacher is teaching us.  Once she sat in on one of Beth’s classes, just offscreen, and I don’t know what the teacher said, but she went off.  I’ve never seen her so angry.  She was talking seriously about pulling all of us out of school and teaching us from home.  She decided against it, but she’s been randomly sitting in on classes without the teacher knowing.  Word seems to have spread, because the teachers have been really, really careful.

I saw an old episode of the Cosby Show on YouTube and Sabby reminds me of Claire Huxtable.  They look a little bit alike, but when Sabby goes off, she reminds me so much of Claire Huxtable, especially when she says “I won’t have it!”  I showed Sabby, and she laughed.  “Where do you think I got that from?”, she said.  “Bill Cosby wasn’t exactly a shining example of a man, but that was one funny show.”

I asked her what Bill Cosby did.  She wouldn’t tell me.  She said to look it up if I really wanted to know.  Quite honestly, I really don’t want to know.  I prefer to think of him as Cliff Huxtable, silly, funny family man.  Kind of like Dave, come to think of it, but Dave is nice in real life too.

That’s one really neat thing about having no memories – and there aren’t many neat things.  But I don’t know any of these things.  so if I don’t want to know, I don’t have to know.  I think Sabby knows that too.  Not telling me some things is a gift she gives me, and I think deliberately too.

However, there are some things they did have to tell me that I should have already known.  I remember when Sabby and Dave gave me “The Talk”.  How embarrassing!  I mean, it was informative and everything, but… embarrrassing!  And confusing!  How does that fit there?  Oh well.  Maybe someday I’ll find out.  Maybe.  A long time from now.  Hear me, Sabby?  A LONG TIME FROM NOW.

There.

It’s not that I don’t like boys.  I do!  They are cute, and confusing, and it’s so adorable when they try to be all macho and impressing but just end up being silly billies!  I’ve caught them staring at me before, and I won’t lie, it’s a really nice feeling.  It even makes me feel a little tingly inside.  But I just don’t want all that complication.  My life is complicated enough.  Maybe someday I’ll know what it’s like to kiss someone, but I just…  I just can’t.  Not now.

I’m pretty sure I don’t like girls that way, either!  I mean, I like cuddles and hair brushing and all the fun stuff us girls do together, but that’s all it could ever be.  When Beth and I cuddle it’s like a big warm teddy bear that breathes and snores and mumbles, and I love how it feels to cuddle a big warm teddy bear that breathes and snores and mumbles.  But she’s not like a boy, not at all.

Life is confusing sometimes, but not that confusing.

Well, I should probably take a shower before I get into more trouble.  I promised Sabby I’d keep this blog kid-safe.  That’s about as far down that road as I can safely go.  So no more.

Weekend tomorrow!  One thing I do love about weekends is Dave doesn’t have to work so we do things as a family sometimes!  Like go to the waterpark!  Or… go to the waterpark!  Or maybe, I dunno… go to the waterpark!!!

Not hinting!  But it is fun to go to the waterpark, and I like it when Dave isn’t working and we can all do fun stuff together!  And that’s what I love about weekends.  So I guess Fridays are good anyway!  It means the weekend is here!  And we can all do something fun!

I know, not every week, but still.  I love having a family to do fun stuff with!

Fridaaaaaayyyy!!! YAAAAAAAYYYYY!!!

Love you all!!!! ❤️ Oh, and you’re all silly billies too.  All of you.  Sillllyyyyyy billlliiiiiiesssssss!!!!!  Silly billy filly milly hilly yilly…  silly!!!!  Like me!!! Ok bye!!!

Hi!  It’s me!  Lily!

Yesterday was a boringly boring day.  Sooooo boring.  Nothing interesting to do.  No Karens, Liz had some classes, Beth was out with her friends, David doesn’t care if I live or die (but he’s a kid, so I’m not upset), Dave was working, and Sabby had housecleaning and chores to do.   I could have helped Sabby and I do if she asks, but this time she just seemed to want to get it done, and I just get in the way.  So I just sat on my computer and did stuff.

I’m not really a gamer.  I don’t like to play computer games.  They’re mostly boring.  I think maybe someday I’d like to actually write them, or at least I think that would be more interesting than playing them.  I listen to YouTube, or read fanfiction, or look up things that interest me.  Maybe not the most useful thing, but I don’t have to be busy every minute of every day!  Sabby wants me to be useful, but she also reminds me that I’m young and have a lot more things to learn than most people my age, so she’s okay with me just playing around, within reason.  There are some sites that are off limits, though!  And eww anyway!  Who wants to see that?

But I guess on the net you can’t avoid seeing some things you don’t want to.

Anyway, I looked up Japanese.  All those squiggles!  It’s so hard to even know where to start!  You’ve got squiggles up and squiggles down and squiggles to the left and squiggles to the right, and then they take those squiggles and smash them together to make more squiggles.  I have no idea where I’d even begin with that language.  Maybe I should just find out what the basic squiggles are and start there.  I was reading that they have two alphabets!  Two!  What kind of craziness is that?

The squiggles are kind of pretty though, I’ll give them that.  Our letters are all blocky and angular and even the curvy ones are boring.  But theirs are pretty and artistic and really look nice.  Their language sounds nice too!  Too bad I don’t know anyone in my area who speaks it.  I’ve never seen a Japanese person here.  Not one.  I’ve seen Koreans, but not Japanese.

Sabby tells me that getting those two mixed up is a pretty bad idea.  They gots history!

I saw some Japanese videos on YouTube.  I gotta say it.  Those people are insane!  Hilarious, but insane!  There’s this one game where two girls (I think they were girls, maybe my age) had to blow a cicada in each others’ mouths.  Who comes up with that??  The Japanese, that’s who!  But their shrines are rather pretty, I like them.  And Mount Fuji is really pretty too.  Maybe someday I’ll go.

But, to be quite honest, I have enough to learn here, first, without trying to learn all about a different culture.

Anyway, I went for a run this morning, sadly without Liz this time.  I think she has a free day though so we might spend some time together.  I wish we had more time to spend together.  You know for all the time we’ve spent together we’ve never brushed each others’ hair?  Liz has long, thick, shiny hair.  I wonder what it would be like to brush it!  I’ll ask her if she wants to.

Well, like I said, it’s a boringly boring update, full of boring boringness, with a sprinkle of boring.  But then, you’ve got me to tell it to you!  Ta-da!  Me, the tall, cute sixteen year old with too many exclamation points and no memories!  Maybe that makes it interesting!

Nah.  Not even I can make that boringly boring-inated boring update interesting.  But I can try!!!

Love you all!!!  ❤️