Hi! It’s me! Lily!!!

Yes, I’m still lily.  Walking shrine or ark or whatever, I’m still Lily.  I’ll always be Lily.  I’m just a Lily with a job, even if I really don’t know what that job is yet.

I was talking to Liz about all this while we were supposed to be sleeping last night, and she told me she thinks I have some of the special characteristics I have because what I am can make me a target, and it’s not fair for me to be a target without having a way to defend myself.  I guess that makes sense.  But it also means I have a responsibility, and he would be pretty mad at me if I screwed it up.  So, I guess I can’t.  I guess my job, like the one I have at church, is to just be, well. me.

I can do that.  I think.


I did ask him if it’s alright for me to go to Japan with all this, and he said it doesn’t really matter, I can go anywhere and do anything I want to do… when I’m supposed to do something, I’ll know.  This wasn’t intended to take up my whole life and make it so I can’t live it.  It’s also really hard to impossible to abuse (if I try it just won’t work), but if I try, we’ll have words.

I guess I wouldn’t expect any less.

I’m not that type, though.  I’m flawed in some ways – I can be a little clueless, a little selfish, just a bit hedonistic…  but I’m not a bad girl.  At least I don’t think so, and no one else seems to think I am either, so I guess I’ll be okay, maybe.

Anyway, I have a life to life.

Liz is going to go back to sleeping at her house after this weekend, and I’ll miss her.  It’s nice to have her next to me.  I feel…  a little safer than when she’s not.  And I know she feels that way, because some storms came through last night and she was holding on for dear life.

She’s really scared of storms.  I don’t know how to help her with that.  Maybe… hmm.

She’s better than she was, but she still whimpers a little at 3 am, especially when the phones go off with severe thunderstorm warnings.

What’s a severe thunderstorm, anyway?  I guess I should look it up.  I mean I know they can have wind and hail and tornadoes, but what makes them severe when other storms aren’t?  I’m sure there’s a reason.

Oh… Anathema and Joe came back.  I haven’t been able to go see them because, well…  but she seems happy.  They’re setting up in his base housing.  That means she really can’t work at the shop anymore because he’s like sixty miles away, but…  we’ll still keep in touch.  We’re helping her move this weekend.  Well, everyone else is.  I’m probably going to be still limping around the house.

Funny how for all my “gifts”, I’m still limping.  I guess I wouldn’t have had that chat with God if it didn’t happen, but still.  I guess there are limits.


Love you all!!! ❤️

From the creator:

Well, we learned a lot.  But… there are a few things that I haven’t yet revealed.  I didn’t even really know myself until recently.  But the story should resolve, well, nicely.  And they’re really big things that will completely change the course of the story and her life.

There’s a problem with doing the story like this, in the format I did, though.  There are some things she posts that if this were reality would be a very bad idea.  I mean, colossally “you-are-such-a-moron-little-girl” bad idea.  She’s had a few of those in the past, and I’ve even known I was sacrificing reality to tell the story.  Truth is, I can’t do otherwise.  To tell the story how I want I have to break the three and a half wall or something like that.

One of those moments is coming up in the next few months.  You’ll know it when you see it, and I’ll call it out here, but if this were real life, not only would she probably not post it, she’d probably delete her diary, get off the net, and we’d never hear from her again.  But because this diary is the only way I can tell her story, she will need to talk about things that could, (won’t, but could), get her into a whole metric buttload of trouble with a bunch of three letter agency people you wouldn’t want to get into a whole metric buttload of trouble with.

But, it’s fiction.  It’s a story.  And, her story needs to be told.  Here.  So, there will be some allowances made for that.

I have no other way to resolve that problem except to just not mention it or not tell parts of her story that need to be told, and that is not acceptable.