This diary entry is part 8 of 25 in Lily's diary dated 28 - October 2023

Hi! It’s me! Lily!!!

I’m… still depressed.

I did my classes and homework and everything today, but I feel like a dried out husk that could get blown away if a gust of wind comes along.

Sabby got a little upset with me about it.  I don’t care.  I’ve seen her a lot of ways, but never depressed.  Or at least not that she’s shown me.  Maybe she doesn’t understand.  Maybe she does.  Whatever.

I know I’m just eighteen and that there could be many “fish in the sea”.  I’m pretty cute and have a nice body and I bet I could attract any man I really wanted – but I want Jack!  I wanted him ever since the first time I laid eyes on him, and I want him now!  How am I supposed to just turn that off?

Shikataganai I guess.  Can’t be helped.

The only thing I think Sabby was maybe right about is that it would be months before I have to really really choose, and a lot of things can happen before now and then.  But that doesn’t really matter, does it?

Maybe I just need to go shopping and buy some cute shoes.  Retail therapy does work… sometimes.  Maybe not now, but at least it would be a good distraction, right?

Liz is a little worried, too.  She’s over now.  I think she’s trying to get me to cry.  It’s annoying…  but bless her anyway.  Maybe she’s right after all.

Love you all!! ❤️

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