Tonight we’re having a family night because it’s Easter Sunday, so Sabby doesn’t want me to write tonight.
I guess I understand.
See y’all tomorrow!!!
PPPBBBTTT Sabby! I wrote anyway! HhaaahaEEEPP LET GO OF MY EAR
I’ve been starting to go over old posts and linking all of the relevant parts together so I can do QA for plot holes.
And this really sucks, doesn’t it?
Oh well. May as well see it through.
And I’m still a bit annoyed with Sabby!!!
But… I guess I understand.
I asked her about it. Well, more accurately, I told her to sit down and spill. She got that “don’t talk to me that way” look on her face, but I wasn’t going to back down on this one. That’s important.
Finally she sighed and told me the story.
Yes, she was a rocker chick. A drummer rocker chick.
Apparently that was one of the things that fueled her, well, lifestyle, when she was young. She picked up the drums for much the same reason that Crystal picked up the guitar – insecurity, popularity, well, you know. And it did make her popular.
But when she met Dave, she gave it up. She gave up the lifestyle and if she kept drumming it would be a lot harder to leave it. And then she just kind of… became ashamed of it. She hasn’t told many people up until now.
And then she, well, turned the tables on me. She read last night’s blog post, and told me I was being stupid for thinking they don’t need me anymore. She said that the reason you need someone, I mean really need someone, isn’t because of what they can do for you, but it’s because you need them.
I guess she’s right.
It’s still difficult.
Anyway, in other news, Joe popped the question to Anathema. Can you believe it? He’s being really careful, though. It’s not that he doesn’t trust her, it’s more that she has done a lot in her life that makes it difficult to trust her, but they’ve been talking about that at length lately. And, well, I guess she convinced him, because he gave her a ring and everything. But he said if she goes back to her old behavior, they’re through. It’s not because he wants to tell her what to do, so much as that’s something she resolved to do, and he loves the Anathema he knows now, but doesn’t love the Anathema we all used to know.
That’s fair. She thinks so too.
Yes, it’s the same Anathema, but the old one was destructive. Even she knows that.
I guess I might have a wedding to attend, if it happens before I leave for Japan. It might, they want to have the wedding before the baby is born.
It’s not his baby, per se, but… he doesn’t want it born without at least a father figure.
Oh… as expected, the performance last night popped up on LINE. I guess there’s someone who attends all the bands hoping something Japanese happens. Beth isn’t famous, but there were a few comments saying she did very well for a gaijin, etc. She’s preening a little. I hope it doesn’t go to her head. She’s not like that, but that’s also a bit new to her.
And, of course, Yuki. All’s going to plan. I guess the idols are going to show up sometime next month and they’ll do a lot of rehearsals, a few with the symphony too. Yuki can’t pay them, but they will get a bit of a stipend so they can pay for travel, see the sights and all that. I guess they’re pretty happy with that.
So… let’s see. Next month… the eclipse (the glasses arrived a few days ago, YAY), Jack’s prom, the symphony concert… and who knows what else. Busy!
Jack and I would have gone out but Easter’s tomorrow and we’re all doing sunrise services. Awww.. Guess I’d better get to bed.
From the creator:
I found a program called “obsidian” that does at least some of what I want to do, like trying to figure out what plot holes there are and retconning them. It’ll be somewhat laborious but at least it’s doable now. I figure a few a day and I’ll at least have all the data entered by the heat death of the Universe.
I’ve noticed how Lily’s vocabulary has changed. This wasn’t really intentional, but it’s interesting. She’s picked up things as I did, but I left it in there because Lily’s a teenage girl and she’ll pick up some things too. When I first started writing, I tried to deliberately dumb down her vocabulary. I gave up on that a couple of months in. She used to speak more childishly (SILLY BILLY LILY and all that) and didn’t say things like “awww”, but that all kind of morphed. Retconning that will be too difficult, and besides, she started at around fifteen or so and now she’s eighteen. That happens in real life, too.
A lot of the development of her interests mirrors mine, but not entirely. I got into anime, so she did too, and a few other things besides. But the way she handles those interests is different from me. For example, remember the electronics lab Dave built for them? I find that stuff really interesting. She just kind of got through the lessons and left it to David. I have to write what I know, but I can only overlay my interests on Lily so far before it becomes inauthentic. I don’t want that to happen.
Also, I’ve been very torn on the subscriber specific stuff, but I’ll save that thought for another note.
THANKFULLY.
Hi! It’s me! Lily!!!
I don’t know whether to hug or choppu Beth!!! THAT GIRL!!!
So here’s what happened.
We practiced a little today, and made sure we were all warmed up, then changed into our “rocker” outfits (Crystal is HOT) and went over to the shop. There were a couple other bands lined up for tonight too, but we were near the beginning.
So… When it came our turn, we got on stage, tuned our guitars, and did a decent job. People clapped politely, there wasn’t a lot of screaming or anything, but no one seemed upset, which is good. We played a couple of our original songs.
Then Beth told me to stand up, and Sabby took my place. SABBY!!! Miss “I don’t know how to play anything” Sabby!!! She grabbed the drumsticks, twirled them around, and just smirked at me.
Well, that shocked me enough, but then Liz came up and plugged a keyboard in. Well, that’s not too much of a surprise, really, she’s not a pianist like me but she’s had enough lessons that she can find her way around a keyboard if she wants.
Then Beth said “I’ve been keeping this from Lily, my big sister over here, all week.” Then she handed me a comically large box of tissues, like in my birthday “convention”. “We’ve been practicing in secret all week.. Well, sort of secret, because we’ve just been kicking her out and telling her to eat some chocolate and leave us alone.”
Everyone laughed.
“So… here you are, Lily.”
Sabby clicked her drumsticks together, and they started playing “U & I”. You know, from K-on. I heard those first few notes and, well… opened the box of tissues.
I was kind of a mess by the time they were done… If you don’t know, “U & I” is kind of a love song between sisters. In the K-On anime, Yui wrote it for her little sister Ui after Ui took care of her when she was sick. But I knew what to do… I clapped hard, and said “You guys aren’t very good, are you?”
Everyone who’s seen K-on laughed. Which isn’t a lot of people in the audience. But no one seemed to care because I glomped her right after I said that, and didn’t really let her go. “Can’t… breathe…”, she said, and the mic picked it up. The audience giggled.
Then we all said our thanks and got off the stage, to slightly more enthusiastic than polite applause. I needed to cry anyway. OMG.
Sabby playing the drums was not the only notable thing. Beth sang the song in perfect Japanese. I know she doesn’t speak Japanese, at least not well, so she had to learn it phonetically. That’s… not easy at all. That’s almost as impressive as Crystal picking up the guitar as fast as she did. I’ve been teaching her diction, but she wasn’t that good two weeks ago.
I… feel conflicted. I love Beth for that. I mean, I really love Beth for that. It was the best, most wonderful love song anyone’s ever sang to me, and I know she was singing it to me as well. But I’m conflicted… they did that without me. They found the song (well, we did watch K-On), Beth learned the lyrics, Crystal learned the guitar, Sabby learned the drums… everyone learned that… and didn’t need me. At all.
I’ve kind of been the glue holding our group of sisters together ever since that group formed. That’s not just my ego, it’s a fact, and my sisters have told me that over and over again. That it wouldn’t be the same without me. I love them so much, and they love me too… and they don’t need me anymore.
I’m going to go to Japan for school, their lives will go on, and they won’t need me. They don’t need me. I’m… I’m not the glue holding all the sisters together anymore. They don’t need me for that. They… don’t really need me for anything.
But the song Beth sang was all about how much she needs me. And she had to know that, I mean, she didn’t pick the song because it sounded nice. She knew what it meant. So she was telling me how much she needed me, all the while showing me how much she doesn’t need me.
We’re all growing up. I should be happy about that. I am happy about that. But… it hurts a little, too. Well, it hurts a lot. When I go to Japan… will anyone remember me? Will it be like when I was found on the side of the road, and didn’t know who I was, and the only people who did weren’t telling?
Anyway… tomorrow, I’m going to corner Sabby and make her tell me why she was hiding the fact that she could play drums so well from me all this time. I mean, she was good. It wasn’t like she spent the last two weeks practicing and got that good. That was years of experience.
In those wild years she was telling me about… was she a rocker chick?
I guess I can understand why she’d want to leave all that behind, but… why now?
I don’t want to seem ungrateful. I really don’t. Everyone tried their hardest to give me a nice surprise. And it was nice. I loved it. I love Beth and Crystal and Diana and Liz and Sabby for doing it. And now I just want to stare at a wall and cry.
This diary… did not go in the direction I thought it was going to when I started it. This was one of those situations where Lily had her own thing to say and I was just writing it down.
That happens sometimes.
Also, I need to start digging through archived posts for plot holes and start retconning. That’s about, what, 500K words right now? I’m not looking forward to it. I was writing a plugin tool to hopefully make that easier but it turned out that WordPress is probably not the right platform to build such a thing, and I don’t have time to build something from scratch – I have far too many more productive things to do. So I’ll probably just end up writing a whole bunch of notes in a spreadsheet or something. Or hire someone to do it. Six of one…
I’ll try to make some pictures of the group in their band outfits, but that might be its own challenge. Clothing isn’t the easiest thing to make in vRoid, and booth.pm has a whole bunch of stuff, but licensing can be a challenge…
Lots of practicing going on right now. Me for my concert, the band for, well, its concert tomorrow, and Liz and Beth have to get their time in too. Hopefully this quiets down soon.
I did have a meeting with the conductor and played through my piece. He says it still needs some work but it’s coming along really well, and he wants to start practicing with the actual orchestra next week. That’s pretty cool. I hope I don’t screw up too badly.
Today we went shopping and got clothes for our performance tomorrow. You know us girls, we love shopping for clothes. Crystal wanted us to go wild, but I put my foot down and said that I wanted to wear something I wouldn’t be ashamed to see plastered all over LINE, because, let’s face it, chances are high it will be. Crystal backed down on that, she forget I was semi-famous in Japan. So we got some edgy t-shirts and skirts that are a little shorter than all of us are comfortable with, but not so short that Sabby told us to stop slinging parts from one side of the room to the other. It’s a pretty good compromise. I don’t usually wear short skirts, but I made an exception for this time. Even Jack didn’t mind, and he can get a bit prickly when I wear stuff that’s too revealing.
So, well, tomorrow’s our concert.
Beth’s been kicking me out of the practices for about half an hour everyday. It’s truthfully getting a bit annoying, but she’s throwing chocolate at me, so I can’t be too mad. Sabby’s being a bit cagey too, I wonder what’s going on.
Oh well.
I might post late tomorrow. Our concert is tomorrow and then there’s an afterparty of sorts, and… well… might as well enjoy it because it’s all ending soon. Right?
I wrote this on a tablet. WordPress and tablets don’t seem to mix. Sigh.
MEIJI ACCEPTED ME!!!
I wasn’t expecting it to be that fast. But, they’d already interviewed me, and I guess the fact that I’m “train onee-chan” kind of was a tick in my favor. I… I guess I’m going to Japan this fall.
I’m happy. But…. but I’m not.
I guess they’re going to send an orientation packet, and a few other things, and all that kinda stuff. Thankfully, there’s very little I have to do actually in Japan, so I’ll just fly there when it’s time. I guess I have some visa stuff to do with the Japanese government too, and… and…
and…
and I’m going to Japan.
I’m happy. I should be happy. This is what I wanted. I… then why am I crying?
I told Jack, too. He… he’s taking it well. Better than me, I guess.
Again, I’m making stuff up wrt Meiji. About the only thing the Meiji of this story has in common with the Meiji of Chiyoda ward is the name, the fact that it’s got a big tower, and it starts in September (as far as my small amount of research tells me). At least one of those things could even be wrong, but if it is, I’m just going to go with it for the story. Or retroactively rename it to Beigy and have it have a tannish-white color scheme and have it start in September.
But I think it’s right. Meiji is supposed to be, as far as the very small amount of research I did, a western-style University in Japan, so it hews to the western school schedule. Dunno how that works, but hey.
Lily’s going to Japan, probably around the end of August. And that’s when the story will end. At least this iteration.
But I have some very fun stuff planned right up until then. Not every day, of course, this is a “cute girls doing cute things slice of life literary-moe” story, (and sometimes CGDCTSOLLM stories are just about having cute girls lazing around and making fans make warbling sounds by yelling in them – I’m looking at YOU, Konata), but enough that there are a couple of storylines I’m looking forward to. Especially one very close to the end of the story.
Truth be told… it’s time for the story to end. For the same reason I stopped paying attention to Babymetal. This story was at its best when Lily was fourteen or fifteen, and so were her friends. Now that she’s eighteen, she’s transitioning to adulthood. It’s the way of things, of course, but not nearly as fun to write. I mean, I guess I could, right? But then it would be a bunch of cute adult women doing cute adult things, and, well… it’s just not the same. If I want to write a story like that, I’ll just have it start like that.
Nothing wrong with it, it’s just never been the story I wanted to write here.
Yes, Lily is ending. It’s decided. Exact date unknown, but it will probably be sometime between August 24th and September 1st. It may well be she hops on a plane right after leaving Jack’s birthday party. Umm… yeah. That could make for a poignant ending.
Vaguely tolerate you all!!! 💩hehehe
I still don’t know what Beth’s up to, but she’s really preparing for something. The girls came over this evening so we could practice, and then after a while she kicked me out again. Awww.
Oh well, I went to get a chocolate shake, she even threw money at me so I’d go, so… win-win, I guess. Maybe I should be upset. I’m not, though. I don’t know why.
Otherwise, I’m going back to practicing, but not quite as intensely as before. I mean, I’ve got it memorized, I can play it through, it’s not like I’m not going to be prepared. So I’ll be alright I guess.
Sabby promised she’d take me to the waterpark after my concert. SCORE.
Anyway… ummm… nothing else big going on. Just the usual stuff. Practice, school, other practice, even more other practice (Liz has her concert coming up too), and… ummm… yeah. Just a lot going on, and most of it musical.
Wonder how that happened?
Oh well.
I think it started with Bocchi the Rock. Crystal got inspired, and, well…
Sigh.
Oh, it turns out, everyone else forgot if we made a band name, so we just took a bit of time and thought of a new one. We’re “Crystal and the Rockiest Rocking Rockers that ever Rocked in Round Rock”. But we just abbreviated it to “Crystal’s Rocking Rockers”. None of us care that she gets top billing. It’s pretty much her band right now anyway. We all just did it for her.
Yeah, that’s a lame band name. These are bunch of teenage girls. What did you expect, after all?
Beth kicked me out today!! Awww!!!
The girls came over for our weekly practice and we were doing some practice, then after an hour she told me to get out and go to the mall or something, there’s something she wants to surprise me with.
Awww.
Is there anyone else who can play the drums? I guess we’ll find out.
So I went to the mall or something. When I came back she was looking really satisfied with herself, but I guess we’ll find out. She wants to book next weekend at the shop/venue for a concert… but I guess we’ll see what she’s cooked up.
All the other girls weren’t telling me a thing. AWWWW.
Anyway, I trust Beth, she won’t do anything too embarrassing. I almost said she won’t do anything embarrassing, but then, I’m not a minor celebrity in Japan (and at anime conventions) because she wouldn’t do anything embarrassing…
She wanted to practice “Idol” too. Girl’s really gotten good at singing. I mean, she’s not professional, but I’d feel comfortable on a stage with her.
She’s gotten okay at guitar, too. Nowhere near Crystal levels, but she can strum out a few chords, so she’d be okay at rhythm guitar. I guess she goes over to Crystal’s house sometimes after school and practices with her. If we were to Bocchify our roles, I’d be Nijika, Beth would be Kita, Crystal would be Bocchi, and Diana would be Ryo. I have no idea how they managed whatever they were doing without a drummer, but… Beth wouldn’t have looked so self-satisfied if she didn’t have that covered…
Diana’s getting a little more into the band stuff. It’s still not her first choice, but I think she likes spending time with her friends and making music.
Oh… and Crystal keeps improving by leaps and bounds. At this rate she’s going to be a top-rated guitarist in a couple of years. How she pulled that one off, I don’t know, but I admit… I had discounted her. Maybe she’s found her calling.
Anyway… Sabby’s booked us, for better or for worse. I guess I’m going to have to make sure to have brushed up on the drums, too, amongst everything else. Oh well. Of all of us, I have both the easiest and most difficult job, so I think it’ll be okay.
Next Friday night! Come see us! … come to think of it, did we ever actually name our band? Hah!!! If we did, we’ve never really used it, so I genuinely forgot. I should ask the girls.
Oh, ummm… dangit. We have to talk costumes. Maybe Anathema can hook us up. I refuse to wear anything too rocker chick though. Torn leggings and knee high boots… okay. Jean skirt and tube top… okay. Temporarily dyed hair… eh, but okay, I guess. KISS style makeup and leather body? NO.
Sabby would kill me, anyway.
Beth had a surprise birthday party today!!!
My job was to keep her busy.
So she and I had a sister spa day.
I took her to the spa and we had a massage and all that good stuff… and then she came home and, well… got surprised.
Girl burst into tears and started blubbering about how much she loved everyone.
Her best friends came over, but also her singing teacher, my other sisters, Jack and family, Anathema and Joe, and Emiko and family came over too!!!
(i haven’t seen Emiko in a while so it was nice to catch up)
She had a very big chocolate cake and lots of presents. Lots of books as well, but Sabby also told her she’s getting good enough that she can perform something at the shop soon!
She had a really good time. She says she doesn’t feel any different now that she’s seventeen (on Monday) but that she’d better get cracking on finding a boyfriend. Dave looked a little sick at that, and she just smirked. She knew what she did!!!
In other news, Miki’s coworker wanted to chat with me about how to practice to get better. Apparently Miki has been showing the video of me performing that Schumann concerto to everyone who’ll watch, and they’re really impressed. They all seem to be of the opinion that while they’re more famous and better at being idols, that I’m by far the better musician. I don’t know if they’re right, but I guess they might be? So I just told her to practice a lot, find people who can teach her what she doesn’t know, and be sure to take breaks.
Japanese people can be very bad at taking breaks, sometimes.
I’m actually a little surprised she’d ask. Apparently, while they get training, most of what they do is “sink or swim” – they get taught basic strength training and the things they need to be idols, but not so much the things they need to excel at being idols, or the things that might help them springboard their career. They’re on their own for that. The Japanese idol industry isn’t… great… sometimes.
All the girls are over now, we’re full of chocolate cake and are whittling down what’s left (it was a big cake, Sabby had baker make it and spared no expense), and everyone’s kinda rubbing their belly and in a sugar haze. Anathema has the night off (last night was the big concert night so tonight’s more laid back), so she’s here too and giving makeup and beauty tips to Beth. I guess that’s her present. She’s darn good at it, though, and all the girls are listening very, very intently.
Sugar hazes are the best kind of haze to be in, I guess.
Whoever Beth eventually ends up with is going to be a very lucky guy.
This… might be the last birthday I get to celebrate with Beth for a few years.
I… I… oh damn it. Damn it all.
From the creator:
We’re going to be encountering more and more of these “lasts” over the next few months.
I kinda feel the same way Lily does, in a way. It hasn’t really hit me that the thing that I’ve spent the last nearly three years sitting at my computer every night and writing is about to go away. Only about six months to go.
All the girls are over tonight. We’re about to go to the shop to see a couple of bands perform. We’re pretty popular now, which is cool. Word’s gotten around that we treat bands fairly and don’t take too much of a cut of the merch, so they like coming around and performing. Sabby and I are talking about doing a competition at some point, but not quite there yet. Maybe when we get a bigger venue. That’s coming, I think.
Otherwise, pretty quiet, today. I still didn’t practice a lot, just enough to maintain. I’ll start again next week.
Yuki has all of the arrangements, and has a couple of idols who want to come over and perform with her. But the catch is, she can’t pay them. I think I mentioned that Sabby’s okay with having them stay here for a little while, though, and they get to come to the US and see the sights. One or two idols dropped out on hearing that, but it looks like she should have a team of three. That’s plenty! Now it’s just costumes and choreography, but Yuki’s a madwoman when she gets going, so I don’t think that’ll be a problem. And she’s competent, so…
Speaking of which, one of Miki’s coworkers/friends reached out to me, she wants to chat. I wonder what she wants, but… sure. I’ll hear her out. They’re not my sisters yet, but they’re friends, if they want to be.
The eclipse is soon!!! Yay!!!
All this excitement for four minutes. Reminds me of romance… oops. Did I say that out loud? Haha!! No, I’m not talking about Jack.
Okay, well, the girls are watching anime and I kinda want to see what’s going on. They’re watching a stupid one about a guy and a talking java finch. Wut?
From the creator:
Yeah, that’s a real anime. Sasaki to piichan, or Sasaki and peeps. I watched one episode and it probably just gets worse from here, so I put it on hold. It’s funny how many mid to low quality anime are out there, but the really good ones make it worth it.
I practiced very little today. I did my scales and exercises, and went through the piece one or two times just so I don’t forget anything, but other than that, I just did other stuff. I went shopping this evening to get Beth her present. I got her a present, but she deserves something more special, and I don’t really have any good ideas.
But Sabby did, so she’s going to run with it. She says I work too hard on these kinds of things, and she’s her daughter, so let her have a little fun. Fair.
Liz is over tonight. We did a little practice on her piece (it was nice to play something else), and now we’re just kinda chilling. Liz is pretty chill most of the time. She doesn’t really like drama. It seems to follow some people around, but not her. Well, most of the time. Her parents have been a lot more chill too. They still expect a lot out of her – you can’t take the tiger out of the mom all the time – but they’ve become a lot more accepting of the fact that she needs to do normal teenage stuff too.
She’s… umm… gone farther with her boyfriend than I have with Jack. But she mostly keeps that to herself. I asked her if she regrets it. She said no, but yes. Apparently he’s very gentle and considerate, but… he hasn’t really committed yet, and it makes her a little insecure.
I guess I see why they say to wait.
Commitment is important.
Oh… I got my SAT results back today. I didn’t get the highest score ever, but I did pretty well. Well into the realm of “get into any college I want that cares about such things”. So I sent off my Meiji application today. I think it’ll go well, but I have to jump through the hoops. Good that I can pay for it myself, I guess.
I told my financial manager to make sure that I had enough liquid funds to pay for the four years, because I don’t want to be taken out by a stock market crash. That was Dave’s idea. So I have an investment account that has about half of my net worth, and a bank account with about the other half. I’ll have to investigate how to move some of those funds to Japan, etc., but I guess one thing at a time. I’m so lucky to have that ability – in some ways. The shop is doing really well… Sabby and I are working on finding a larger venue, because larger venues make more money, and our shop is really small for the number of clients. She has a few leads and we’re going to look at them soon. Truth is, while my share in the shop is worth quite a bit more than what I put in, I haven’t seen much of it, both Sabby and I are reinvesting. That’s alright. I’ve got plenty. And I believe in what we’re doing.
Jack got his SATs back too. He did well. My scores are a little higher, but his are still good enough to not get in his way. He’s considering applying to some pretty good colleges in the midwest. It’s where he’s from, after all.
Beth got her practice SAT scores as well. She blew me out of the water – if the scores had been real. I’m not surprised. She’s always been far smarter than me.
And Liz… hers were almost as good as Beth’s.
It hasn’t quite hit that we’re all going to be going our separate ways this fall. I’m (hopefully) going to Japan, Jack’s going somewhere in the midwest, Liz… I don’t know where she’s going, but it’s going to be a dang good school… Beth’s going to be home, but all of us won’t… you know that scene in K-on where all the girls are against the wall and talking about all the fun they’ll have next year, and then it hits and they all start crying? It might be like that. It’s not yet, but.. it might be like that.
Sabby says that graduation is the closing of one era of your life and the opening of another… but I like this era. I like spending time with all my friends and not worrying about anything but studying and practicing, and all the fun things I get to do with my family and friends….. and it’s all going to go away soon. Just a matter of months now.
I won’t lie. The thought hurts. It hurts a lot.
But there are very few people who haven’t experienced the exact same thing. Right? I guess it’s what Dave calls a rite of passage.
Think happy thoughts, Lily. It’s still months away. Think happy thoughts. It’s just sweat. I’m just sweating. From the eyes.