Category: Diary

Hi!  It’s me!  Lily!

And it was a day off!!!

OMG I love days off!!!

So I did my run this morning, and then showered and had breakfast, and then… nothing!  Blissful nothing!  I just lounged around and…  did nothing!  And it was wonderful!

But it didn’t last.  Sabby and Dave packed us into the car and we took a drive!  We went to Fredericksburg!  It’s a neat little town!  There was stuff to see and do!  We walked up and down the main street, and ate lunch, and ice cream, and it was fun!  And there were museums too!  I just knew Dave and Sabby would sneak school in.  But I didn’t mind!  We went to the Museum of the Pacific War, and the Pioneer Museum!  We ate lunch and had ice cream!  Then after a few hours we drove home!  It’s about a one and a half hour drive!

It was fun!  We don’t get to do things like that often!  There was even more to see, maybe we’ll go back!  Apparently where I live there were lots of German people a long time ago!

Wunderbar!!!

And that’s all the German I know.

Die Lily!  hahaha!!! That’s my name!  Not die as in die, die as in the German female article!  Die Lily!!!  Oh, nevermind.

After we got home, Dave grilled!  Oh, I love it soooo much when Dave grills!!!  It was a great way to spend a holiday!!!  Liz came over too and she ate Dave’s Famous Grilled Meat with us!  I asked her if her parents minded her spending so much time with us.  She said that they’re just glad she has friends!  And, after all, I might be family someday…

I blushed!!!

But I smiled too.

Now it’s time to sleep! 

Love you all!!! ❤

Hi!  It’s me!  Lily!

Lily Lily Lily Lily Lily Lily luhluihluhluhliuhluhLILY!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’m a LILY!!!!!!!!!

But you knew that!!!

I’m LILY!!!!!

YURIKO.. errr… LILY!!!

I like being Lily!  It’s fun being Lily!  I get to wear dresses and work and… and be Liz’s best friend… and…  ummm…  do stuff?  Yeah!  I get to do stuff!!!

I should play Lily says!  It’s like Simon says but it’s Lily says!  Lily says stand on one foot!  Lily says twirl around!  Put your foot down!!! I didn’t say Lily says!!!!  You lose!!!

But I always win because I’m Lily!!!

Okay okay okay.

So I got home from work today and Dave was doing some pressure washing.  He’s a bit clumsy but seemed to be doing well.  I love pressure washing!!! The air smells like water, and something that was dirty becomes clean!!!  He pressure washed the driveway and the sidewalks and the side of the house…  he didn’t try to pressure wash the grass!  This time!  Hahaha!!!!!

Remember, I said he has pressure washing accidents!  He does!!!

So this afternoon he opened up the lab.  He said he was going to be in the garage anyway so David was free to tinker if he wanted.  David ran in and started tinkering.  Dave and I dinked around with the lawn mower.  He showed me that it has a spark!  I got sparked!  OWIE!!!  That HURT!!!

But he then asked me what it means if it has a spark but won’t start.  I said…  fuel?

He agreed.  So we tested the fuel pump.

BAD!  BAD FUEL PUMP!!!

So we’re going to replace it!

Is that all that’s wrong with it?

So then Sabby called us in to dinner.  Crystal had left before I got home (this morning she told me I was the best big sister ever and gave me a huge hug, it was sooo sweet) and we ate.  I guess it’s a Sunday night.  Right?

Oh oh oh!  Tomorrow’s a holiday!  We get the day off!  And I don’t have to work!!!  We’ll do something fun!!! I don’t know what yet.

Sabby’s going to invite Emiko and family over next weekend.  I know David will like meeting Mika and Aika again!  I’m…  kiiiiinda looking forward to it?  I don’t know.  Her family is nice, but…  but…  is it mine?  It should be.  Is that the problem?

Bedtime, and Beth’s hair needs a brush!

Love you alll!!! ❤

Hi!  It’s me!  Lily!

Today I worked!  Or could you tell from the title???

The owner asked me again if I could work more hours, but I explained that the weekend was the only time I could work, because Dave and Sabby are teaching me stuff in the evenings.  And I wasn’t even lying!  It’s true!  He seemed disappointed but I told him this summer he can have as many hours as he wants, as long as I get to go on whatever trips I need to go on.  He thinks I’m a good worker!  But it’s not hard to be a good worker.  Dave was right!  He told me “Half the battle is showing up”, and you’d be surprised how many employees don’t even bother to show up!  I show up!!!

We all went to the park this afternoon!  We had a picnic!  Dave grilled this morning, and we got all the fixins, and we found a spot at the park and ate our food!  It was my family and Liz’s family and Crystal’s family too!!!  It was fun!!! Afterwards we played games!  We played frisbee and tag and there were even enough people for football!  Both kinds!!!  We got home and now everyone’s tired!  Even Dave!  Even me!!!

We’re about to make a girl-pile again and Crystal can barely keep her eyes open!  It’s soo cute!!!

Love you all!!!  ❤

Hi!  It’s me!  Lily!

Liz and Crystal are here!  We’re about to have another sleepover!  We seem to do that every weekend now, but it’s fun!!!  I have my best friend and Beth has her best friend and we have a bestie mashup!!!

It wasn’t perfect, today.  I mean, school was school, but when Dave got back from the job site, Crystal and her parents showed up soon after!  Beth and Crystal immediately went up to her room to do Beth and Crystal stuff (talk about boys?  I dunno) and we were all sitting down in the living room while Sabby made dinner.  I wanted to ask them about Crystal, but I didn’t know how.  And then Liz and her parents came over too, and the opportunity was lost.

Sabby made something delicious for dinner again.  I couldn’t actually quite identify it, it was some kind of asian fusion dish.  She called it “Beef Ramenoff”.  Sabby is so weird when she gets creative.  It was still delicious, though.

Beth made popcorn and we ate popcorn and snacks and drank soda, and watched a movie.  We let Crystal choose the movie, and she chose “Lolita”.  Everyone looked at her funny, and her parents said that wasn’t an appropriate movie for a girl her age.  She just sighed.  “Oh, like anything that’s happened to me has been appropriate?,” she snarked, and then folded her arms defiantly.

We didn’t watch “Lolita”.  We watched “The Last Mimzy”.

Crystal really seems to resent life.  I’d say I don’t know why, but I know exactly why.  But what’s to be done?

After, though, Liz’s and Crystal’s parents went home (oh did I mention they got a car?  It’s a secondhand one, but it seems to run well) and we all went up to my room.  Crystal was kind of being snippy, but we all had an unspoken agreement to make it a Crystal night.  I brushed her hair, Liz did her nails, and Beth chatted with her.  A few minutes later, Crystal started to relax, and I could see a tear forming in her eyes.

“What’s wrong?,” I said, as she trembled.

“Why are you all so nice to me?”, she asked, her voice quivering.

I frowned.  “Because you’re Crystal, and we love you.”

“But why?”

“Because you’re Crystal!,” I said, and Liz and Beth agreed.  Beth wrapped her arms around and hugged her.  “Why do we need a better reason than that?”

“But I…”

“You nothing!”, I said forcefully.  “Bad stuff happened to you.  I’m so sorry for that!  If I could take it away, I would!  But I can’t, and it’s not your fault!”  I wiped the tear from her eye.  “Just let us love you,” I said quietly, and went back to brushing her hair.  A couple more sobs escaped her, then her head started lolling as she started to truly relax.

“I don’t deserve you,” she said quietly.

“No, but we don’t deserve you either,” Liz said.  “No one deserves anything good, but we can be thankful for it.  Now sit still, I’m trying to apply a clearcoat here and you’re moving too much.”

After Crystal started to relax, we tried to think of a game to play, but we just settled for chatting about everything and nothing.  And that’s the best thing of all.

I’m writing this before we turn in, and this time the girl-pile has four!  Yay!!!

Love you all!!! ❤️

Hi!  It’s me!  Lily!!!

Tomorrow’s Friday!  Yaaaaaayyyy!!!

So today I had lots to do.  I practiced piano, I studied Japanese, I ate lunch, and then I went out to work on the lawnmower.  I opened the little hoody thing and just kind of stared at it for a while.  It had wires and hoses and belts and…  stuff!  Lots of stuff!!!  I didn’t even know where to start!!!

So I put the hoody thing back on and went to study something else.

Dave asked me later after he was done with work what I’d done, and I said “nothing.”

“Nothing?  I thought I told you…”

“I lifted the hoody thing and looked inside, then I gave up.”

“You didn’t even try?”

“Try what?”, I said frustratedly.  “I guess I could turn the key, then what?  I don’t know the first thing about how to fix one of those.  And you just tell me to fix it!  You guys did the same thing with David, telling him to cook dinner when he’d never even held a measuring cup!  What do you expect from us anyway?”

“I expect you to try!”

“Try what?,” I almost shouted.  “Try sticking my hand in a lawnmower without knowing what could hurt me?  Try getting hurt?  I appreciate what you’re trying to do but I need to be taught, not just left to hurt myself.  You told David he couldn’t use the lab without me or Beth, why don’t you care if I get hurt?”

“Of course I care, Lily.”

I sighed.  “I’m not working on that without someone to teach me.”

“Lily -“

“No,” I said.  “I’m not working on that without someone to teach me.  I want to learn, but not like that.  You can fail me or whatever, but I’m not doing it.”  I turned around and walked up the stairs.

I’d never talked to Dave like that before.  I don’t think he liked it much.  I didn’t really care.

I love Dave and Sabby, but they’re not perfect.

Sabby came up to my room a little later and sat down next to me on the bed.

“You shouldn’t have talked to Dave like that,” she said, reprovingly.

“Maybe not, but I did,” I said.  “And I meant it.”

She sighed.  “You were right,” she said.  “You could have been a little more diplomatic about it, but you’re right.  We’re supposed to be your teachers, not your doctoral sponsors.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means we’re treating you like a college student, not a high school student.”

“Is Dave mad at me?”

“He’s a little hurt.  But he’ll get over it.”  She patted my knee.  “Come eat dinner.”

Dinner was quiet.  Thankfully.

After dinner, Dave and Sabby sat the three of us down and told us that while we’re still expected to learn things from the lab and from working on our projects, that he’ll be more involved in that part of our education.  He told us that that means we might have to do some stuff in the evenings, but he and Sabby will make it fair so maybe some days we can take an afternoon off.

That’s all I wanted.

He immediately took me out to the garage, popped the hoody thing, and we started to troubleshoot the lawn mower together.  Turns out it’d crank, but not start.  But I feel better about it with him guiding me.

They’re not perfect.  They make mistakes.  But what makes them good parents is they’ll admit it.  That’s one reason I love them.

Liz and Crystal comes over tomorrow!  And I hear Allison has a big event this weekend!  Wish I could go!!!

Love you all!!! ❤

Hi!  It’s me!  Lily!

I finished my presentation!  It’s sooo cool!  It has videos and graphics and everything!  I learned all the parts of engines too!  I learned about the spark plugs, and pistons, and connecting rods, and bearings, and crankshaft, and flywheel too1  I learned about the transmission (sooooo many parts!) and all of the other stuff!  I don’t know if I could fix an engine, but I could tell you what might be wrong!

Maybe.

Beth and David finally finished their project too.  So we had a presentation!  They built a little robot that scooted around and scared the cat!  I explained how all the parts worked together, and everyone politely clapped.

Then Dave asked me what the differences between a gas and diesel engine are.

Crap.

More studying, I guess.  He just smirked.

Dave then took me out to the garage, where there was a shiny riding lawnmower sitting there.  I asked him what that was all about, since we didn’t have a huge lawn.  He just grinned.

“It doesn’t work.  Make it work.”

“But…”

“You wanted to learn this stuff, right?  Well, here it is.  It’s got an engine a lot like a car’s, I bought it for very little because it doesn’t work.  I’ll buy whatever tools or parts you think it needs, and I even found a service manual for it.  But I want it working by the end of the year or an explanation of why you can’t.”

“What will you do with it once it’s working?”

“I haven’t thought that far.  Just fix it.”

“I don’t…”

“Lily.  You can’t break it worse than it is.  Do you want to learn or not?”

I sighed.  “Do you know what’s wrong with it?”

“I know as much as you do.  You can start troubleshooting tomorrow.”

Well, I guess I’m learning how to fix a riding lawnmower.

Still might be fun.

Sabby worked with David on cooking today.  He didn’t make dinner, but he did make us a snack.  It was edible.  Not the tastiest thing in the world, but it did the job.  He seems to actually like it!  Maybe it’s because cooking is just applied chemistry?

Speaking of applied chemistry, I love Jack!  Did I mention that?  His job is going well, his driving lessons are going well, he seems to be doing better since his parents started taking more interest.  But I hope to see him soon!!! I miss him!!!

Love you all!!! ❤

Hi!  It’s me!  Lily!

It was not a good day.

Sabby and Dave got home this morning, and immediately called David and me into the living room.  She sat us down went off.  I wasn’t the object of her wrath, but I was there because I was, well, involved, I suppose.  She told David that while it was good that we sorted it out, that his behavior was absolutely inexcusable, and he was not getting his games or console back for two weeks.  He tried to protest but Sabby wasn’t hearing any of it.  Finally he stomped off to his room and Sabby sighed.  I just sat there.

“Sabby?”

“Yes, Lily?,” she asked, still seeming a bit peeved.

“I don’t think I want to be in charge anymore.”

“Well, you’re the oldest, and that comes with being the oldest.”

“Look, Sabby,” I said, “Maybe I’m the oldest, but I had to call you just to get David to even start to listen to me.  He doesn’t respect me.  We’ve never really gotten along.  I don’t dislike him, he’s my little brother, but all he’s ever done is get in trouble.  I even got angry with him yesterday, and I never get angry!”

Sabby sighed.  “Do you really think that you being put in charge is just for David or Beth?  It’s for you, too.  Having to lead people who don’t want to be led is a life skill, and it’s important to learn.  Just like being led by people you don’t want to lead you is a life skill that David has to learn.   How do you think you could have handled it differently?”

“I don’t know,” I said.  “I really don’t.”

“Well,” she said, “for one thing, you called me.  I’m not saying you were wrong to, but what could you have done so that you didn’t have to call me?”

“I don’t know.”  And I wasn’t lying.  I really didn’t.

“You didn’t feel like you had any authority.  So you didn’t act like you had any authority.  You used my authority.  Again, you weren’t wrong to, but David didn’t respect you because of that.  You’re always trying to get along with people, you aren’t very good at taking charge when you need to.  I had already given you all the authority you needed, and told David that.  You could have exercised it.”

“How?  He told me to pound sand when I told him to study instead of playing games.”

“And you could have told him that if he didn’t start studying like he was supposed to right then that you were going to take all of his games and put them outside with a sign that says ‘free games here’.  You could have just gone to the garage and flipped the breaker to his room.  You could have told him that you weren’t going to order lunch until he did all his studying.  You could have…”

“I get it!”, I said, raising my voice.  “I get it.  I failed.”

“You didn’t fail,” she said softly.  “But you could have handled it differently, too.  Sometimes leading is about making decisions that people don’t like, but know are your responsibility.”

“So what do I do?”

She sighed.  “Do you remember how I dragged Beth over to the homeless shelter?”

“How could I forget?”

“I’m afraid I’m going to have to think of something similar to do with David.  You’re right that he’s gotten away with far too much, though he’s grown up some lately.  I’ll think about it.  Oh,” she said, “I almost forgot.”  She rifled around in her purse, and pulled out a couple of bills.  “Here.  That’s for babysitting.”

“I wasn’t -“

“If it weren’t for you I’d have had to hire a babysitter anyway, so I might as well give it to you.  You could use it anyway.  Besides, you earned it.”

“But I failed -“

“Everyone’s fed, still alive, and the house is still standing.  When you’re my age and have kids your age you’ll take that as a win.  Now go study.”

I did.  I still had that presentation on internal combustion engines to finish.  And I wanted to spend a bit of time in the lab too.

I was thinking about what Sabby said all day.  She’s right.  I’m not very good at taking charge.  I just go along with whatever, and that works most of the time, but it didn’t really work yesterday.  Maybe it’s time I be the older sister, and not just Lily.

Now if I can just figure out what that means.

Love you all!!! ❤

Hi!  It’s me!  Lily!

Happy Valentine’s Day!  I have chocolate for you!  Well, I don’t.  I ate all the chocolate.  But I have a chocolate box for you!  It… smells like chocolate!  It’s something!!!

Hey!  I have a flower for you too!  I’m a Lily!  I’m your flower!  You can put me in a vase and make sure I get sunlight and water!  I’ll be happy!

Or I’m a silly billy.

Maybe I’m a silly billy Lily!  Like I’ve been saying!  SILLY!!!

Okay okay okay.  I’ll give you a chocolate.  Here.

🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎

Today…  was not a good day.

Oh, it started out that way.  This morning Sabby and Dave made sure we had their telephone number and all that, packed up a few things, gave me some instructions and set me up to be able to order food, and then skedaddled.  Beth was nice.  She just went off and studied.  She likes studying so it’s not a huge deal, she can study whether Sabby’s teaching her or not.  Well, David decided that wasn’t gonna fly.  He just went off to play games.

I told him that he had to study.

He said he wanted to play games.

I told him that he was my responsibility and that he was supposed to study.

He told me to pound sand.

I called Sabby.  She told me to take his games.

So I did.

Oh, that did not go over well.  Finally she said to put him on the phone, and I could hear her yelling across the room.  She said that she and Dave didn’t get any time to themselves, that this was Valentine’s day, and if she had to come back home he wasn’t going to see his games or console until summer break.  And she wasn’t kidding, either.  She was cheesed.  And I didn’t blame her.  I was a little upset too.  I was put in charge and the least he could do was let me do what Sabby told me to do.

He was still giving me lip.  Well, you know me, people.  I’m pretty easygoing.  I don’t usually get angry, I just kind of go with the flow, you can count the times I’ve been angry, truly angry, on maybe one or two hands since I started this diary.  I got angry.

I told David that I didn’t know what his problem was, that he had been treating me and his entire family like crap for as long as I could remember, that all he ever seemed to do was get in trouble, and I was tired of it.  Just do what you want, I said, when Sabby comes back I’ll tell her everything he did, good or bad, and then I was done.

I don’t hate the kid, I really don’t, he’s my little brother, but I’m just sick of it.

He looked at me like I’d grown a second head.  All he could say was “You don’t get mad.”

“Not usually,” I said.  “But you’ve managed it.”

“Why are people always mad at me?”, he asked.  There was actually a tear in his eye.  Sigh.

“Because you don’t think about other people!”, I said.  “I know you’re nine and I try to be understanding but… but…   GRRRRR” and I stomped off to my room to study.

Things were quiet until lunchtime.  Beth was studying, I was studying, and I honestly didn’t give a flying fig what David was doing.

Finally around lunch I called everyone down and asked them what they wanted for lunch.  David and Beth wanted hamburgers, and you know what, why not.  So I ordered some food, and while we were waiting for it to arrive, we just kind of sat around the kitchen table.

“Lily?”

“What?” I said.  I was still a little cheesed.

“I’m sorry,” he said, and he gave me a kind of shy side-hug.

“For what?”  I wasn’t letting him off that easy.

“For not letting you be in charge.”

“You know I’m only in charge because Sabby wanted me to be.”

“I know,” he said.  “I just…  I just don’t like it when people tell me what to do.”

“Well, no one does,” I said.  “But sometimes you have to.  Especially when you’re nine.”

“Can I have my games back tonight?”

“No,” I said.  “Your mom wanted me to take them away, and I’m not giving them back until she gets home.  We’re playing board games tonight.  Just the three of us.”

“But =”

I just glared at him.  He shut his mouth.

The food arrived, and he was quiet for the rest of the day.

True to my word, we played games.  We played scrabble, and clue, and a few other games too.  Beth made popcorn, and we ate popcorn and chocolate and I ordered Italian food for dinner.  David calmed down and even seemed to enjoy himself a bit.

I called Sabby and told her how the day went.   She told me I handled it well, and that David needs to grow up a little, and that it was good that the three of us played games.  She kept telling Dave “stop!  I’m on the phone!” while giggling – I wonder what that was about.

I put David to bed an hour ago.  He’s not used to someone other than Sabby tucking him in, but I didn’t mind.  He’s too old for a story, but he was out like a light shortly after I turned his light off.

I chatted with Jack for a bit before writing this.  I told him how much I loved the chocolate.  He said he would have thought there was something wrong with me if I didn’t.  He’d be right.

Love you all!!! ❤

Hi!  It’s me!  Lily!

Well, Sabby did it again.

She and Dave decided they want to have a romantic getaway tomorrow for Valentine’s day.  They haven’t been able to do that for a while because Beth and David were young and they didn’t trust them on their own, even though Beth is probably old enough for that now.  But I’m here now!  So, They’re going to go somewhere tomorrow and come back the next morning.  And I’m in charge!

I’ve been in charge before – remember when we went to Houston?  But not quite like this.  I’ll have to make (well, order) lunch and dinner, and make sure everyone’s doing their schoolwork, and do mine, and take care of anything that comes up.  It won’t be a huge deal unless one of them throws a fit.  I hope that doesn’t happen.  Beth’s gotten a little more mellow since that time we had to go to the homeless shelter.  But David…  he’s still kind of… being David.  Not a bad kid, but…  wants things his way.  And he’s not really too happy about having to listen to me.

So we’ll see how it turns out.  I guess it’ll be okay.  Sabby knows I’m pretty responsible.

We had fun last night playing games!!!  We played twister!  We’d never played twister before!  Beth’s pretty flexible!  So am I!  Liz… isn’t.  She ended up getting a cramp and we all fell all over each other.  It was glorious!  Around 11 or so Sabby told us to cut it out, she’s trying to sleep.  We played a quieter game for an hour then made a girl-pile.  Did I mention I like girl-piles?  Everyone’s so warm and smells like soap!

Whenever I tell Jack about our girl-piles he’s strangely quiet.  Boys…  He’s a nice boy and I love him.. but.. he’s still a boy.  Sabby tells me boys come with… well, boy-ness, and we just have to deal with it and make sure they know what our boundaries are.  Jack’s been really good about that, but you can tell he still, well, thinks boy things sometimes.

Sometimes I’m glad for that.

Today Dave and David plonked themselves in front of the TV and watched the big game!  I don’t see what the big deal is!  Just a bunch of guys smacking into each other and throwing a ball!  But they were really into it!  Yelling and cheering and having a good time.  Their team won!

Anyway, another week starts!  It’s starting to warm up a little and the weather will soon change from cold fronts blowing through every other day, to cold fronts blowing through every other day and making storms!  Storms are fun!  Sometimes!  That hailstorm last year wasn’t fun!

I’m working on doing streaming and YouTube stuff!  I’ve been working on it for a while, but there’s a lot to learn!  I’ll get it soon!!!

Love you all!!!  ❤